We are midway through this colossal road trip. I have heard it said over the last couple of days, “I finally feel like I am actually on the Equality Ride.” We are five stops into the ride and the feeling of surrealism is beginning to dissipate with every real and meaningful conversation that we have on campus.

As many of our friends are silenced and arrested on the East Bus, we speak on their behalf. We act as the collective voice. We make connections with students and faculty; we exchange phone calls, text messages, and emails; we find those who are hungry for this conversation. We are ready, willing, and prepared to engage. Our hearts burn with passion for equality for all humanity. Each person who “comes out” to us or who genuinely thanks us for coming to their school keeps our fire steadily burning.

Namaste… This word resonates in my mind. It resonates for my friends and also for my adversaries. It makes it possible to truly love my neighbor whether they think favorably of me or not. Namaste all you who are LGBTQ. Namaste all you who are ally. Namaste all you who are skeptic. The Divine in me sees the Divine in you.

I close with the words from Galatians 3:28, which read: “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus.”

In God’s grip for all eternity,

Jillian Nye in Portland, Oregon (missing my little Jubal-lee)

The past 14 hours in Fresno, CA have been a whirlwind of emotions ranging from joy to frustration. We have been on the campus of Fresno Pacific University (FPU) where we have engaged in some of the best dialogue of the ride thus far. The conversations with students, staff, and faculty have been both challenging and productive. I for one feel as though I understand even more fully what it is to be an Equality Rider–what it is like to be barraged with questions, misconceptions, and Bible verses taken out of context.

Arriving on campus, we enjoyed a continental breakfast seated at various tables intermixed with administration and faculty. The conversation started almost immediately as FPU representatives were very interested in hearing about our backgrounds and stories. I had the pleasure of sitting with Rod Reed, a Pastor at FPU who had been the contact person who helped plan our visit to the campus. Myself and several other Equality Riders sat and talked with him for hours as we each told our own personal story of faith and identity and then asked him to address our concerns with regard to the FPU policy. Pastor Reed responded to each of our concerns but often provided disappointing answers.

The Mennonite Brethren is a denomination for which I hold great respect. They are active in the community and concerned about social justice and gender and racial equality, and it saddens me to realize that a group of people so enlightened and concerned about those topics could have such a long way to go in terms of LGBT equality. I respect Pastor Reed and FPU for their willingness to have this conversation, but could not help wanting to cry out as the conversation led in circles. I was sitting before a man who showed more love and compassion than most people I have met, and yet I could not lead him to understand that I am not a disease, or a mistake, or a curse, or a sin; I am a person, created wholly and fully by God and affirmed by God as a gay man.

As the conversation with Pastor Reed came to a close, dozens of other conversations similar to it continued throughout the day. We met people of various backgrounds, in terms of both their faith and their upbringing. One woman came to the room that had been provided for us and simply asked for the ability to pose questions. She said she didn’t understand anything about being LGBT or even what those terms meant. Her questions were genuine, and we were able to have real dialogue regarding faith and sexual orientation. At the end of the day, she came back and found me again, but this time she brought three friends with her, hoping that they too might be touched by our stories in the same way that she had been.

Many great conversations also occurred in the classrooms that we were invited to visit. Equality Riders participated in class discussions on the Biblical history of Leviticus, Corinthians, and Romans, facilitated conversations on creating safe spaces for LGBT people, and made a variety of presentations in other classes at the invitation of FPU professors.

Unfortunately, not all of our encounters were so friendly or respectful. A pair of students spent about an hour sharing with me their belief that I could not possibly have accepted Christ into my heart because if I had, he would have cured me of this disease. Shortly thereafter, another student shared his belief that being gay was a curse placed upon me because of sins committed by members of my family. It was frustrating and painful that in a community so obviously committed to education, social justice, and Christian values, people could actually believe that my love for another man was a curse placed upon my family and me.

At the end of the day, we all joined together again–the faculty, administration, students, and Equality Riders. We shared our experiences on campus and talked about where we go from here. One professor shared her own story of having many gay Christian friends and wanting to see safe spaces and equal treatment for the LGBT community at FPU. Another professor shared his desire to expand this conversation and express his concerns not just at FPU but within the greater Mennonite church. We exchanged hugs and expressed our gratitude to one another for a great day of dialogue.

At this final meeting, I felt sorrow and pain that in a room of such amazing and intelligent people, I was unable to fully express the damaging effects that their policies have on LGBT people; sorrow and pain that despite a great day of dialogue, there was still a separation of our two communities; but mostly, sorrow and pain at knowing that while I had a good day, was well fed, and had the opportunity to have my voice heard, so many others around the country and even on FPU campus had not.

Dialogue is a great step, and it’s commendable to be open to conversation, but regardless of the dialogue that is happening, people are still dying. I commend FPU on being open to this conversation and for showing us Christian hospitality, but I remind FPU and all of those reading this blog that real people–your friends, relatives, family members, acquaintances, and co-workers–are suffering, some even dying, every day because they are not allowed to live the life that God has intended for them.

I can only hope that the dialogue that occurred at FPU will lead to the creation of a space for LGBT students to be true to themselves.

March of 2007 marked the Equality Ride’s second visit to Brigham Young University. The administration again refused to negotiate on-campus dialogue. Stop organizers Matt and Kourt knew that students were ready and waiting to talk about issues of faith and identity that are literally life-or-death for many LDS people. They organized presentations, dinner meetings, and discussion groups for our three days in Provo, UT. I would estimate that over a hundred people participated in the events while we were there. The Equality Ride brings a much needed conversation to campuses unwilling to have such a conversation on their own.

On our last day there, we moved our events closer to campus: a six-hour march around campus to make ourselves readily available to students, a press conference at the main gates of the school to let the community know of BYU’s refusal to dialogue, and an evening rally in nearby Kiwanis Park to give a voice to the Brigham Young students.

Brigham Young University stop organizers Kourt Osborn and Matt Kulisch collected over 55 pages of concerns and grievances regarding LGBT students at BYU. Many students personally know LGBT people who have suicided or attempted suicide because of the fear and disconnection generated by BYU and LDS policy and doctrine around sexual and gender identity. These concerns are very real.

Kourt Osborn and his mother decided to bring these concerns to campus when university administrators refused a meeting to discuss them. In the following video, Kourt speaks about his experiences during the events planned around the Brigham Young University campus.

One of the constant companions of the Equality Ride is the sense of anticipation. With the exception of the west bus co-directors and me, this two month adventure is a giant unknown for all of the west bus Riders. Where will we sleep tonight? What’s this church that is hosting our dinner tonight going to be like? Will we get to meet students and make new friends today…or, will we be greeted by a contingency of police and threatened with immediate arrest? It’s not unlike a day in most of our lives…it just feels like there are hugely different implications.

It’s with that sense of anticipation that we boarded the bus in Calabasas, a small town just over the mountain from Malibu, CA and Pepperdine University. We’d had a wonderfully satisfying two days at Pepperdine and were now headed up to the San Francisco Bay area, specifically Berkeley, home of the Free Speech movement of the ‘60’s and so many other movements for the liberation of oppressed people, for two days of group work, tweaking our presentations, addressing our strengths and weaknesses in how we interact with the college and university communities with which we’re meeting. Everyone feels the responsibility of doing our very best as we have unique opportunities to connect with students at our upcoming “dialogue” schools.

Fresno Pacific University, with a student handbook statement which states ”The University is opposed to homosexual, premarital and extramarital sexual relations” is our next stop. With such an exclusionary statement as this, there’s no safe space for LGBT students at FPU. We are determined to bring with us, some way, some gift from God, that will create a more open and safe atmosphere for FPU’s LGBT students.

So, our work here in Berkeley feels really vital. Hosted by long time Soulforce friend Pastor Jeff Johnson at the University Lutheran Chapel (located just a few short blocks from University of California Berkeley campus), we spent nearly eight full hours reaching even more deeply for the stories and presentations that will effectively communicate the life or death nature of our visit. We know that suicide is too often the chosen response to the condemnation and intolerance of many of these Christian schools and everyone of us are radically committed to bringing this confused and dangerous system of religion based oppression down. Like David standing against Goliath, we have our sling loaded with pebbles of truth and of new thought and we’re determined to “slay the giant.”

We broke into groups and self analyzed our behavior on past campuses…how did we interact with students? Did we approach them with a loving spirit? Were there too many of us in the groups? How can we represent LGBT people with integrity and genuine love? Back in the larger group of all 26 Riders…we shared where we thought we were effective and where we needed to work to improve.

Then, we repeated the process looking specifically at our language. Stories. Verses. Tone. Slang. Everything we could think of that just might make a difference between inclusion and exclusion of LGBT students. I think all of us carry a huge burden of representing LGBT people in a positive way. While none of us are alike, it feels vital that we show up in a manner that doesn’t get in the way of our message–that neither our appearance nor our words would take away from the possibility of enlightenment.

On Friday, our second day in Berkeley, we had time for the everyday chores that accompany a tour such as this. Some of us washed clothes or traveled to a grocery store to “re-stock” our traveling mini-pantries. And at noon, we boarded the bus for a short but exciting afternoon/evening in the city…San Francisco! The City by the Bay! And more! We started the afternoon with a tour of the GLBT History Center on Mission Street. Tucked away unobtrusively on the third floor of a downtown office building, the Center has a huge archive of GLBT history…everything from Harry Hay to the Daughters of Bilitis are chronicled here–history that many college age LGBT people haven’t had the opportunity to learn.

And then…folks set off for an all too short tour of one of America’s great cities. The bridge…the Haight…the Castro…the Wharf. So much to see and so little time! But the Equality Ride isn’t really about touring or shopping or having a good time. Our first commitment is to bringing down this system of religion based oppression that is stifling voices and causing so much pain in our lives and the lives of our families. I hope we can all come back to San Francisco and Berkeley in a few short years…when the truth of every LGBT person’s worth is unquestioned, and when every human being is respected for the intrinsic value within each of us.