An Early Frost

[Dash]

I just cried my way through An Early Frost (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0089069/), which just came out on DVD. :'( I never saw this made-for-TV movie when it came out in 1985, and truth is, I was many worlds away from where I am now. I don't think I had a clue about my sexuality then.
http://operality.info/EarlyFrost.jpg


If you don't know, this movie is about young man discovering that he has AIDS. For the mid-80s it was definitely groundbreaking. The main character, Michael, was played by Aiden Quinn (hot! :love: ). Though there are a few antique stereotypes and no expressions of love between men other than hugging, it is wonderfully sympathetic.

I remember my dear dear friend Emlyn, who was the pastor at my old Lutheran Church telling me about her early experience with AIDS patients. She said the first time she visited a man in the hospital with AIDS, they gave her latex gloves to wear, but she couldn't wear them.

I'm so grateful that I am gay. It pleases me to be identified among those who suffer and are despised. Don't know what that says about me, but there you go.

I would love to hear from some of you who might remember seeing this movie when it came out. If you haven't seen it, run out and get it and share your thoughts here.

Love ya'll :love: :love:

[NonLemming]

Dash, I haven't seen it since the year it came out. Aiden Quinn was very very good in it and Gazarra and Rowlands were fantastic. It was a beautiful movie and very on target for capturing that time/now.

Glad you brought back the memory, I may have to get it.

Thanks!

[Daniel]

Dash- I remember seeing the TV film and it setting my hair on fire: I was just starting to deal with being gay and entered graduate school the next year. I remember it having a very powerful affect on me- but- unfortunately, it didn't make me smart. I took some sexual risks during that period for the simple reason that I was uneducated. I dodged that bullet, but looking back have to wonder at myself. What was I thinking? Was I thinking?

A few years later I got a real wallop from Maurice, E. M Forster's novel that was made into a movie (1987). God! It hit me between the eyes and broke my heart. I saw it at the Paris theatre (near the Plaza hotel) and remember balling my eyes out walking crosstown to catch the subway to the train station. It came out a few months ago on DVD and I watched it again and had the same reaction. Great art/stories do that, don't they?

What the saying? Tears are the beginning of wisdom?

[Britt.]

I haven't seen it, but thanks for pointing out it's exisitence. I'll rent it.

Have you seen It's My Party (http://www.mgm.com/title_title.do?title_star=ITSMYPAR)?

Sad Sad. Everyone I've shown it to has cried (myself included), despite knowing from the beginning that he's going to die.

[Jennifer5]

Sounds like a great movie.... but I'm not sure whether or not I'm really old enough to be able to really appreciate it... what do you think? Would it be completely wasted on me?

[Vanessa White]

No way. The subject is timeless. I also remember seeing it when it came out and being deeply moved by the approach, even though it was early on and limited in what it would show or say. ALthough I don't remember all of the details of the movie, therefore may have to rent it, I do remember a good part of the focus being on the impact the son's gayness and disease had on the family, how they tried to cope based on the love they had for their son. That came through loud and clear, and that type of theme can ring true with any of us Jen, no matter what the age or circumstance. Rent it.

[Emproph]

I just cried my way through An Early Frost (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0089069/), which just came out on DVD. :'( I never saw this made-for-TV movie when it came out in 1985.. For the mid-80s it was definitely groundbreaking. I remember the promo’s for it clearly, especially the part where he quickly looks up with soft and burstingly gentle eyes.I'm so grateful that I am gay. It pleases me to be identified among those who suffer and are despised. Don't know what that says about me, but there you go. I know what you mean, it’s awesome when you have NO DOUBT. It's like having a powerful secret that only you are in a position to dispense. In our case, the implications of who we are, are indelibly intertwined with "society" and "society" KNOWS IT (think Lance Bass).

Individually, we have a disproportional impact on how “society” defines itself, we are presently famous. We were born on stage and have the pain and potential reward of stand up comedians.

Or like that one guy, somewhere, who said.. “I’m beginning to feel activism as a form of worship.”

Or me: And we shall be called; "They that had their cake and ate it too."

(A bit pie-us maybe, but you can see where I'm going with this..)I would love to hear from some of you who might remember seeing this movie when it came out. If you haven't seen it, run out and get it and share your thoughts here.Again, I will never forget the promo’s, and I knew even at the time that they were groundbreaking. I missed the movie though. I think I tuned in for like 10 minutes toward the last half hour of it, but even then I was all like, if I see the ending first then the whole movie is wasted, plus I wasn’t into the story line at that point, and I think I actually was interested in something else that night, might have been a Friday night..

After that (time period-wise) there was “Making Love” and then nothing. What a nightmare trying to watch that one was. The parents were out but the sister kept coming downstairs, or maybe she wasn’t, either way I felt like I was trying to get away with watching porn. Anyway, back to your movie...

P.S. The dvd cover in your post adds a nice touch. No actually it makes all the difference.

~Heeees Dreeeamy~

Come to think of it, a groundbreaking 1985 made for tv movie coming out on dvd is groundbreaking in itself... :tup:

P.P.S. Those were 3 channel tv days... Oh the humanity.

[LGBT FLIGHT ATTENDANT]

Sometimes, when I saw the lost opportunities in creating Pittsburgh in Toronto but really a caricature of WestHo, the Cowlip individuals were more effective and restrained when they got AEF through the censor filters of the day.

OF COURSE, the domestic partner was unable to stay and support his life partner. OF COURSE, he had to go home alone, and receive the care of his parents.

MAURICE was wonderful because it was the Merchant-Ivory repertoire actors who brought it to life...and because it was a victorious effort for the Edwardian era when in contrast, the eighties produced nothing of the sort.

[Dash]

I remember the promo’s for it clearly, especially the part where he quickly looks up with soft and burstingly gentle eyes.

...

Again, I will never forget the promo’s, and I knew even at the time that they were groundbreaking.



Well, then you'll definitely want to see the DVD! The trailer is included in the special features. :D That Aiden....yes, he's got some eyes. :love:

[tdogg]

Yes, Aidan is a beautiful man, I can totally see how you guys would love him! Also, he is an incredible actor who is underrated for sure.

Think I saw this one when it first came out. I'll have to watch it again to jog my memory.

Unrelated, but does anyone know what's up with Rick? he hasn't posted in a while. Maybe I missed his 'going away for a while' post?

[Zerbie]

The 80s AIDS stories always break me into pieces. Even so, I watch them or read them whenever I get the chance.

Haven't seen this one, didn't even know of the title.

Jen, I'm sure you're not too young to appreciate this. And it will tell you a bit about what was going on shortly before you were born. What a strange sad world!

I would have been about 10 when that movie came out. No chance of being allowed to see it! In 1984 I was busy getting slapped by my mom for having asked her to help the men dying of AIDS. She said I should be glad they were being exterminated before I grew up. I was literally on the floor grabbing her knees praying and crying and all she could think to say was "But that should cheer you up, Zerbie, not make you cry harder!"

Oh yes, 1985. I prayed every night that my "big brothers" would not all die. What a f***ed up year that was. :(

[Dash]

I would have been about 10 when that movie came out. No chance of being allowed to see it! In 1984 I was busy getting slapped by my mom for having asked her to help the men dying of AIDS. She said I should be glad they were being exterminated before I grew up. I was literally on the floor grabbing her knees praying and crying and all she could think to say was "But that should cheer you up, Zerbie, not make you cry harder!"

Oh yes, 1985. I prayed every night that my "big brothers" would not all die. What a f***ed up year that was. :(

Holy crap!!:eek: :eek:

I love you, Zerbie!

[Zerbie]

Holy crap!!:eek: :eek:

I love you, Zerbie!

And I love you, Dash. :love:

Thank you.

[SBP]

...blast from the past~! Man, I still remember when that came out and all of the stigmatizing that it brought to light. But then again, I can also remember the appearance of the first few articles on the new "gay cancer"...then it's evolution to G.R.I.D. (Gay Related Immune Disorder), then to its current (& more ACCURATE) moniker A.I.D.S.

The most compelling film from about that same general time frame that I saw, both for its extremely accurate portrayal of what gay life was like in the 80's, and it's heartbreaking reminder of what gay life WAS like back in the 80's was called "Longtime Companion". A really great film that's a must for anyone, gay or straight, that wants a keener understanding of where we've been before getting to where we are now.

Also try, "The Lost Language Of Cranes". Doesn't deal with AIDS, but it deals with how secrets can rip families apart when there are things that certain children have in common with a parent. I'll leave it at that... ;)

Good work Dash...thanks for the history lesson~!! :love:

[Dash]

Good work Dash...thanks for the history lesson~!! :love:

No, no! Thank you!! I was mostly unconscious at that time. I barely remember any of this stuff. I grew up on a farm in a rural area of Oklahoma...no TV till 1981, never had air-conditioning. It was probably the late 80s (late high school) before I even had a concept of "homosexuality" or two men being in love.

I discovered this DVD at another blog that I frequent. All of the movies that ya'll have mentioned will be added to my list of "must sees" and I appreciate all the background info.

:)

[SBP]

It was probably the late 80s (late high school) before I even had a concept of "homosexuality" ........

Alright now Dash-ster.......you didn't have to make me feel so old in the process~!! *Lol* :D

[Dash]

Alright now Dash-ster.......you didn't have to make me feel so old in the process~!! *Lol* :D

Sorry... If it helps any at all, I'm going through my own age-related crisis on this, my natal day. ;)

[Zerbie]

Sorry... If it helps any at all, I'm going through my own age-related crisis on this, my natal day. ;)

What?! :eek: Is this your birthday, Dash??? I missed that!

Happy Birthday to our wonderful and poetic Dash!!! Many many many more happies to come in future! :D :) :aparty: :rainbow: :weee: :good: :sing:

We love you.

:love:

[SBP]

What?! :eek: Is this your birthday, Dash??? I missed that!

Happy Birthday to our wonderful and poetic Dash!!! Many many many more happies to come in future! :D :) :aparty: :rainbow: :weee: :good: :sing:

We love you.

:love:


Dash, you sly one.....I didn't know this either~!! I echo our lovely Ms. Zerbie's sentiments~!! In fact, I think this deserves a whole NEW thread~!!

Peace & Love 2 U~!!

[nowvoyager]

Dash! Happy Birthday indeed! Many happy returns and I hope your next year is full of joy and chocolate :D

I saw this film ages ago and oooooo it made me cry too. So did "Maurice". Another from that era (actually it may have been a little later) that I loved was "Doing Time on Maple Drive" - though not about AIDS it was an amazing coming out story. YYupp, too many of those and I have to rush out and watch a good comedy.

Daniel, I know what you mean when you said you are grateful to be gay - I agree entirely, it has enormously informed my compassion too, I'm sure.

Zerbie - my gosh, however did you turn out to be so gorgeous :). The people in my little town back then didn't talk about homosexuals at all, and so spoke of AIDS as a disease for bad people and city-types. Took me ages to figure out who they meant...

[Dash]

Dash! Happy Birthday indeed! Many happy returns and I hope your next year is full of joy and chocolate :D

My momma sent me a box a homemade chocolate cookies! So, the next year's got a good start. :cool:

Plus ya'll got me grinnin' ear ta ear! :D

:love: :love:

[Zerbie]

Zerbie - my gosh, however did you turn out to be so gorgeous :). The people in my little town back then didn't talk about homosexuals at all, and so spoke of AIDS as a disease for bad people and city-types. Took me ages to figure out who they meant...

Thanks for compliment! (blush) :p

I figured out this stuff real young. I really believe I was born with an understanding of what homosexuality is and is not, pre-programmed in my brain. That's both good and bad.

Somehow, I had most of this stuff puzzled out by age 6 or 7. I had a *gut feeling* that the big scary H word meant people who fell in love with their own sex. At 6, I used to feel my gut turning inside out when people whispered awful things about homosexuals, instinct said they were talking about innocent people, not monsters. I had a mental picture of two young men with gentle eyes and sweet faces holding hands and kissing when no one was looking. :p Or two pretty girls exchanging flowers and cuddling. :D :rainbow: :good: :)

Then the AIDS crisis blew up and people began talking about gays. That was when I finally knew that the unforgiveable crime society was willing to let them die for was sexual intimacy. I accosted my mom with the words, "I know everyone thinks homosexuality is wrong, but gays don't deserve to DIE for it!" And she slapped me, screaming, scared me so bad. :(

All I felt was love and the desire to comfort and protect.:love: I wanted to sit with the dying and hold their hands. But I was 9. I had just "lost" my mother. :'( So I cried instead.

It would be 12 years before I could speak a supportive word aloud again.

[Jennifer5]

Zerbie, you always make me want to cry when I read these things... you're so sweet and seem to be able to understand everyone and relate and help them with what-ever the problem is.:love: I know what you mean about "losing" parents.... I've kind of lost both of my parents in this sense...


Anyway, thanks for telling me about this movie... I'll have to rent it... (and just find a way to get to watch it with-out my sister)...I sounds like something I need to see... thanks:love:

[Vanessa White]

First of all, thanks for the reminder about "Longtime Companion"- touching and beautiful and more openly focused on the impact on the community at large than "An Early Frost", but both had impact on me. Dash, you sly one, you! Happiest of natal days (I love you referring to it like that, so sweet!). I hope the cookies were beyond delicious!!

And, to my darling, Zerbie- thanks for still being who you were at a mere ten years old, begging the adults in your life to have compassion. You move me almost beyond words. Having that love and caring in your heart at such an early age says so much about the lovely human that you are now. Thank you for you energy and presence- it means so much. :love: :love: :love:

[Zerbie]

Zerbie, you always make me want to cry when I read these things... you're so sweet and seem to be able to understand everyone and relate and help them with what-ever the problem is.:love: I know what you mean about "losing" parents.... I've kind of lost both of my parents in this sense...


:love:

((((Jennifer)))) Thought I'd send you a big hug. Awfully sorry to hear about the "loss" in a sense, of your parents. Emotional distance, perhaps is a way of describing it? That was what happened to me with mine.

You're so loving and gentle on these forums, and so wise beyond your years, I often and easily forget that you are dealing with family strife and challenges at home. You have our care and support, too, in mega-ton doses! :D Another thing - sometimes things get much much better with time and continued effort. Never, NEVER give up. I've watched my own family come light years in the 30 ish years I've been around.

:love: :love: :love:
:pray:

[Zerbie]

First of all, thanks for the reminder about "Longtime Companion"-

Dash, you sly one, you!

And, to my darling, Zerbie- thanks for still being who you were at a mere ten years old, begging the adults in your life to have compassion. You move me almost beyond words. Having that love and caring in your heart at such an early age says so much about the lovely human that you are now. Thank you for you energy and presence- it means so much.

Yes, I want to see Longtime Companion, too. Haven't seen that before either.

Dash IS sly! I guess he didn't enter his birthday into his profile or somethin', b/c it wasn't popping up on the forum menu like birthdays usually do. ;)

Thank you, thank you, thank you, Vanessa!! :love: Tell ya, I thought I was the ONLY person in the world who cared about it, then. I was certain, CERTAIN, that no gay man would be still living by the time I turned 18 (having been assured of that fact repeatedly when 9, 10, 11). I thought I was going to helplessly witness the end for all time. It was THAT pervasive, that bad, and that much of a holocaust. Didn't help to spend my teens seeing adults I knew from theater and music suddenly lose weight, drop out of sight, and a few months later read their obituaries. My parents had me feeling like a freak for caring, but everything inside said it was a crime against humanity for so many people to turn their backs on the dying. :mad:

Anyway, I went through some dark, DARK, scary places in my life. Somehow, made it all the way here, to all these smiley faces: :p :D ;) :rolleyes: :cool: :lol: :love: :pray: :rainbow: :agree: :weee: :aparty: :good: :smashy: :magic: :sing:

Hugs, Vanessa. :love:

[Jennifer5]

((((Jennifer)))) Thought I'd send you a big hug. Awfully sorry to hear about the "loss" in a sense, of your parents. Emotional distance, perhaps is a way of describing it? That was what happened to me with mine.

You're so loving and gentle on these forums, and so wise beyond your years, I often and easily forget that you are dealing with family strife and challenges at home. You have our care and support, too, in mega-ton doses! :D Another thing - sometimes things get much much better with time and continued effort. Never, NEVER give up. I've watched my own family come light years in the 30 ish years I've been around.

:love: :love: :love:
:pray:Yeah I would say emotional distance discribes it best. That you for all your support... you all continue to make a bad day end in something still worth smiling about:D


I was disappointed.. today I went to rent 'An Early Frost' and the guy said they don't have it... I'll try again, maybe they just couldn't find it... but I was really wanting to see it now:(

[Vanessa White]

Hey Jen: I am so glad that you come here for what you need. In all honesty, some of you have given me reasons to keep persevering on some of the most challenging days, and to do it with faith and hope. Total truth. And, Jen, please try to remember whatever you lack in support from those around you, that you have the right and responsibility to yourself to remember how terrific you are. On the days and nights when that is hard to remember, then come here and get some hugs!!!!!

This thread titled "An Early Frost" has me thinking in analogies, that tends to happen to me here a lot! Around these parts of NE PA, people know that an early frost means a change of seasons. Maybe that means, for you, Jen, change is coming. Even if the next season to come is not one of our favorites, change can always have something good come out of it. I hope it doesn't sound like I am simplifying your complex issues in your life too much, because believe me, I AM NOT. Just trying to give you some hope, that maybe if the change comes in you, you can take comfort in that. You are among your other family here. Lots of love to go around......:love: :love: :love: :love: :love: :love: :love:

[Zerbie]

I was disappointed.. today I went to rent 'An Early Frost' and the guy said they don't have it... I'll try again, maybe they just couldn't find it... but I was really wanting to see it now:(

:love: :D

Well if it's an old move, only recently re-released on DVD, then it might be a bit hard to find. (I tried to find The Dark Crystal, but couldn't.) You might try calling around your local rental places first before wasting another trip.

[Jennifer5]

Thanks Vanessa... and the changes that have already come... have been VERY good ones... like my dad moving out about a year and a half ago... took a ton of stress of the whole family. Thanks:love:

and Thanks for that good advice Zerbie... I might call... but you had the good point that it just may be a while thanks:love:

[SBP]

:love: :D

Well if it's an old move, only recently re-released on DVD, then it might be a bit hard to find. (I tried to find The Dark Crystal, but couldn't.) You might try calling around your local rental places first before wasting another trip.


Why, Amazon.com and Ebay, of course~! :cool:

Peace & Love Ya' Lots~!!