... and we lost

[dewdrop_world]

The cultural divide in Virginia grows as Northern Virginia voters solidly rejected the marriage amendment, while the rest of the state believed the right-wing propaganda and passed it by a 14 percentage point margin.

I take some comfort in the Democratic majority in the House, and hold some hope in Democrat Jim Webb's hairs' breadth of a lead over George "Macaca" Allen (which he didn't have when I went to bed last night).

But I'm wondering what will happen in the future. The slam dunk would be a test case where a lesbian or gay couple's wishes were so blatantly denied that it could go all the way to the Supreme Court, but it might take years for a case like that to emerge. (I was hoping for such a case after the state legislature passed the same measure into state law last summer, but nothing happened other than a lot of queer couples fleeing the state into Maryland.)

The most realistic thing I can think of right now is to hold the Republicans at their word. They said throughout the campaign that they didn't intend the amendment to invalidate wills or power of attorney documents, or to prevent hospital visitation (though I think it's pretty clear that they intended to harm custody arrangements). So, let's introduce legislation to write it explicitly into state law that the amendment may never be used against wills, power of attorney or hospital visitation, and see how quickly the Republicans violate their own campaign promises. It would at least expose the dishonesty from the right.

But my fantasy is that Northern Virginia secedes from the rest of the state, taking our tax dollars (which, let's be honest, keep the rest of the state afloat) with us. It'll never happen, but it's not entirely unfair: they want bigotry while Northern Virginia does not, so why should Northern Virginia have to pay for their prejudice?

James

[Lydia]

I'm sorry to hear it, James.

[Vanessa White]

James, can you help me in letting me know what geographically Northern Virginia consists of, as far as what areas? Just those immediately outside of DC?

[pnggrad79]

I know it is disheartening, just like it was last year when Texas voted discrimination into law. I am hoping that it will be declared unconstitutional here in the near future, but I am not going to hold my breath.

I told my wife that if it gets too bad, we will go somewhere where we can be who we are-happy, proud lesbians-and not have to hide. If it is Canada, then so be it. If it is AZ, hey I am all about that. I just wish California would get its act together, as well as New York.

Texas and Virginia are just die hard states. All the hardliners will have to die off or be rendered impotent (as if they aren't already), because there is a bumper crop of GLBT folks coming out and the young ones are tired of this crap. Our main problem is apathy. We have lived with this for so long, that we figure what's the point. I feel like it's going to be long haul and will make the victory all the more sweet.

I am sorry about Virginia! I wish I knew what to say to make it better, but being in Texas, I have no words of consolation. We just live in repressive, southern states that don't want to give freedom to anyone.:(

[Vanessa White]

In recent months, I had been feeling pretty apathetic, ineffective, "what's the use" kind of attitude about the political and legal end of things. THen, New Jersey happened. And now, Arizona. And the Democrats are back in a BIG way. Sure, those things don't solve all of the issues, but I have my hope back again, especially because of Arizona, that maybe, just maybe, one at a time, we can make a difference. So, now I feel like I am ready for those legal/constitutional battles, and ready to pick up my armor. So, if some of us are tired, they can rest, and those that are rested, can come forward. That is why this place works so well, because we support one another. Love to all, Vanessa :love: :love: :love: :love:

[Zerbie]

In recent months, I had been feeling pretty apathetic, ineffective, "what's the use" kind of attitude about the political and legal end of things. THen, New Jersey happened. And now, Arizona. And the Democrats are back in a BIG way. Sure, those things don't solve all of the issues, but I have my hope back again, especially because of Arizona, that maybe, just maybe, one at a time, we can make a difference. :love:

YES WE CAN!!!!!!!!!!!!

I just lived it out last night!! Everyone who worked against Prop 107 in Arizona has just experienced victory, for the first time ever on one of these amendments. We CAN make a difference.

Determine now that you will never give up. I know now that I never, ever, will.

[dewdrop_world]

James, can you help me in letting me know what geographically Northern Virginia consists of, as far as what areas? Just those immediately outside of DC?

Pretty much the DC suburbs, which extend as far west as Dulles Airport (maybe a bit further -- Loudoun County is kind of split between growing suburban areas and rural areas) and south into Prince William County (maybe not quite as far as Fredricksburg).

I was delighted to read today that Allen conceded, giving the Democrats control of the Senate too. So the election was not a total loss. :D

James

[Daniel]

James- I'm so sorry to hear that your state voted as it did. I can imagine the heartache: NY's court decided this summer that gay people do not have a constitutional right to marry, and in the days after that, everyone I knew felt like their guts had been kicked in. But things can change. They must change. They will change. We now have a democratic governor on the horizon, one who has delcared that he will introduce legislation for gay marriage. So goes NY, or NJ for that matter, so goes the rest of the country. And that is as it should be. It may not come tomorrow, but it will come, of that I am confident. It may be plain folly on my part, but my observation is that things contract before they expand- and we're getting ready to expand.

Let's get out the hat stretchers.

[Giancarlo]

I feel that every time we take one step forward in this country, we get pushed two steps back. Every time we make a little progress, someone steps in and pushes us right back. Not that isn't a reason to stop fighting for what is right... it is just extremely frustrating.

[Daniel]

I feel that every time we take one step forward in this country, we get pushed two steps back. Every time we make a little progress, someone steps in and pushes us right back. Not that isn't a reason to stop fighting for what is right... it is just extremely frustrating.

I agree with you. It can be very very frustrating. But that frustration, if it doesn't motivate us to action, gets us nowhere.

I'd rather die trying than give up in frustration. Then the bigots of the world really would win.

Please hang in there!!!!! Your voice counts for something. Really.

[Zerbie]

I'd rather die trying than give up in frustration. Please hang in there!!!!! Your voice counts for something. Really.

Bravo, Daniel! Way to go!!!!!

Never ever ever give up. If you keep trying, it can always get better, at any time. If you give up, you may have been 99% of the way to the goal, but if you stop there, you will not only never reach it, you'll never know how close you were.

[Giancarlo]

I agree with you. It can be very very frustrating. But that frustration, if it doesn't motivate us to action, gets us nowhere.

I'd rather die trying than give up in frustration. Then the bigots of the world really would win.

Please hang in there!!!!! Your voice counts for something. Really.

I do agree, but it is so frustrating and angers me. We have gained marriage in Massachusetts, but the anti-gay marriage crowd insists on trying to get it banned.

I do think it is best trying to change and I think younger generations are showing signs of positive change unlike their elders.