I think I need a hug.

[HarmlessEccentric]

I came out to my parents about half an hour ago.

I kept it short and simple, because I was too scared to say much.

They were very, very quiet. Dad said "Well, you're our daughter and we love you," which is better than yelling, I guess. That's all he said.

Mom agreed to take a couple of books I got because I knew I wouldn't be able to say everything I wanted to. "Straight Parents, Gay Children" and "Stranger at the Gate."

And they stayed as long as was necessary to not look like they were rushing away after that, and then they left the house. Very little was said, really.

It was without question the most terrifying thing I have ever done.

Now excuse me while I have a complete and total nervous breakdown.

[BruceChris]

And ((((((((((Harmless)))))))))) gets LOTSA hugs. Hold your head up, give your parents some time and space, be more than willing to talk, be positive, go and have a good cry. -- Whatever you need, whatever works.

Edit: Neat Blog. Check her out sometime -

God Loves You, We Love You, and God Still Loves You. -- BC

[suzer1013]

{{{{{{{{Harmless}}}}}}}}}

Lots of hugs, thoughts and prayers going out to you. Coming out to parents (or the family closest to us) is probably the hardest step to take. I pray that they will grow to be o.k. with it, and will continue to love and accept you as you are.

Peace and blessings to you....

Susan :love: :pray:

[Dash]

Holy Moley!!! :eek: :love:

Scaryness indeed! I remember my own main event from several years back...well sorta... It was one of those dreamlike, "oh-my-god-am-I-really-doing-this" moments.

Hope you are okay! Whew...

Yes, hugs and chocolate are what you need! :flower: :dove:

[andrewlittle]

Harmless, what bravery. What courage. What strength. You have my utmost admiration and hope for support.

And then, the anticlimax. Time to tremble, to fear the unknown (as far as future reaction goes), to have that good cry Bruce suggested.

I don't know if it means anything to you, but at times that I am trembling I envision God over, around and in me, cradling my shaking heart in her hands and telling me, "Trust me, I love you as my own child."

Curl up in God's embrace, knowing your are loved - especially because you have been authentic and honest to the beautiful image in which God has created you.

Wrap God's love around you like the warmest down comforter you can imagine, and pray that God wraps herself around your parents as they struggle (assumption) with their own expectations and biases.

You, you dear sweet product of God's boundless hesed (loving-kindness), have shown faith in God's creativity and love.

Be proud of yourself and know, beyond belief, that you are dearly loved.

And if a virtual shoulder on which to cry might suffice, here it is. Weep the tears of the righteous, my love, in full knowledge of your Godliness. And shed a tear for your folks as they wrestle with the voices in their own heads. May God show them the real power of parental love.

[keltic63]

Just a quick reply now between events this evening: Harmless, you are much loved, and I'm guessing your dad's reaction is the best indication of how things went. Their first thought was their love for you. Hold onto that!

of course, we all think you are absolutely great, we just can't be there to give you the real hugs you need and deserve! {{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}} to you sweetie!

[Jennifer5]

Yes, don't forget the chocolate, it helps a lot...

:love: :love: :love: :love: I think they're right, you're dad's response is definately what you want to focus on, even when at a lose for words, he wanted you to know that they love you no matter what. It'll take a little bit of time, but I think from what you've told us, it'll all be just fine, hang in there.:love: :love: :love: :love:

[rainbowdog]

HUGS TO HARMLESS FROM RAINBOWCAT. THAT IS A BIG STEP FOR A GBLT PERSON TO COME OUT. IT SOUNDS LIKE YOUR PARENTS MIGHT ACCEPT YOU AS BEING GAY. :applause:
I CAME OUT TO MY PARENTS 3 YEARS AGO AND STILL THEY DON'T ACCEPT ME AS THEIR LESBIAN DAUGHTER:'( . tHEY EVEN HAD THE NERVE TO GIVE ME SOME PAMPLETS ON THE EX-GAY MINISTRIES:mad: OF COURSE I THROUGH IT AWAY:smashy:
GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR PARENTS:pray: :love: :flower2:

GOD BLESS,
CHRISTY:rainbow:

[Zerbie]

((((((((Harmless)))))))) :love: :love:

Lots of hugs for you here.

Congrats on your courage in sharing with your parents. Based on what was said, it sounds like all will be well indeed. And now your parents know you better. :)

[Daniel]

Harmless- no doubt this is one of those days that you will never forget. My love to you! I haven't forgotten the day I came out to my parents- some 20 years ago. I don't think it gets any easier for anyone. But once it's done, everything changes.

I'm so glad your Dad had the where-with-all to say what he did. That's huge! That's the first step for them. And I hope there are many more to come.

[ctozrn]

Congrats to you!

I know what you did was so difficult. I did it 7 years ago and remember the fear! My parents did really well but they felt it was a "phase" They totally accept me now. I have other friends that came out to very religious parents and they eventually came around. The biggest thing you will need is TIME. Give them time and you won't believe where they will be in a year and more.

Your blog is awesome! Writing will help in the days to come. Surround yourself with people that love you! Be good to yourself!

Christine

[tdogg]

Hugs to you Harmless! (((((((:love: :love: :love: :love: )))))))

It's difficult yet freeing - just remember it takes time to process for everyone. Your parents will have their 'coming out' along with yours. Be patient, know they love you and be there to help them through it.

Funny how it's about 'us' really but the focus is often on helping 'them'. Anyways, those are 2 awesome books you gave them, they should help a lot. Celebrate your braveness, honesty, and all that you are. Bravo to you! :love: :rainbow: :applause:

T

[HarmlessEccentric]

Thank you all for the hugs. My parents are in shock right now- I assumed they had at least guessed, but Mom had no idea. I hope that everything works out, in the end.

And I (shockingly) haven't gotten as much sleep as I'd like, so I called in sick today and am going to get some good oldfashioned rest.

[Vanessa White]

Harmless: I applaud your courage and resilience. It sounds like you earned a sick day to rest and recoup your energy. I hope that the process with your parents will continue to become positive. Like tdogg said, they are going through their own coming out as well. Peace to you, Vanessa PS and lots of hugs too!!!! :love: :love: :love: :love:

[ctozrn]

I read your post about coming out to your family. I really admire you for being able to do that! My partner is in the closet, in fact she is under it.... She has told me that she would deny being gay if ever confronted by her family. This has been very hard for me to accept. That is why I can really respect you for having the nerve to tell your family even though they may never speak to you again.

I also read your blog. It is really interesting and cool. You write very well. I enjoyed reading it.I am sorry to hear about your Grandpa. As a hospice nurse, I know that having family support can really help you through those difficult days.

Christine