cousin.of.zuzu
04-02-2007, 02:40 PM
I read this blog post (see below). And I responded with an email to the author. He asked me to be a second perspective, and asked if he could post my email/our dialog on the blog. Does anyone have any thoughts/feedback? Warnings? etc. I'm thinking about doing it but am a bit leery.
This is what I emailed in response to Dianne's story.
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Hi Christian. I just read this blog post and Dianne's story. Here: http://seelifedifferently.blogspot.com/2007/03/out-of-closet-and-into-church.html
And I wanted to email. I think when i read Dianne's story I thought that's great, she went from what was a hard and unhealthy space for her to a healthy space. My story is so different. Which is I suppose why I am emailing. Because this is (I feel) such a very personal, individual hard journey. And for me it's always involved a wrestling with myself, God, and scripture.
I am in my early 30's. A pastor's kid who grew up in the church and who loves the church. I have not been abused. I love my parents and they love me. I was a youth pastor in an evangelical church for a while. I have my masters in theology from a respected evangelical seminary. I was the good girl amongst my friends. I don't get drunk. I don't sleep around. Never have and never will. I have always loved God and been an active serving part of a local church. And in many ways I can't relate at all to Dianne's life as a lesbian.
When I kept becoming attracted to women I went to conferences. I know of Exodus. I went to a conference called the "Pastoral Care Ministries School" by Leanne Payne. I read books. I worked to find healing. I saw a counselor. I have prayed and been prayed for. I been celibate. I have found guys cute but haven't felt attracted to them. I've never longed to kiss a guy.
I feel really spiritually, mentally, and emotionally healthy. For years I've thought my only option was celibacy. Which is so hard because everyone else gets to be with someone. Now I think (gay and straight alike) are called to celibacy in singleness and committed life-long monogamy in relationship. I still wrestle with scripture. Have conversations about scriptural context and lenses. I've always sought to live a God-honoring life.
I guess I need you to hear there there is a bible believing christian lesbian out there who has done everything to work this out that i could. And in the end my wrestling has led me to be open to a monogamous relationship with a woman. I would prefer to marry her.
When the factions of the church fight in the civil war that seems to be taking place over this issue I am the person standing in the middle. All I ask is that people would try not to shoot me (or anyone else) in the process.
This is what I emailed in response to Dianne's story.
---------------------------------------
Hi Christian. I just read this blog post and Dianne's story. Here: http://seelifedifferently.blogspot.com/2007/03/out-of-closet-and-into-church.html
And I wanted to email. I think when i read Dianne's story I thought that's great, she went from what was a hard and unhealthy space for her to a healthy space. My story is so different. Which is I suppose why I am emailing. Because this is (I feel) such a very personal, individual hard journey. And for me it's always involved a wrestling with myself, God, and scripture.
I am in my early 30's. A pastor's kid who grew up in the church and who loves the church. I have not been abused. I love my parents and they love me. I was a youth pastor in an evangelical church for a while. I have my masters in theology from a respected evangelical seminary. I was the good girl amongst my friends. I don't get drunk. I don't sleep around. Never have and never will. I have always loved God and been an active serving part of a local church. And in many ways I can't relate at all to Dianne's life as a lesbian.
When I kept becoming attracted to women I went to conferences. I know of Exodus. I went to a conference called the "Pastoral Care Ministries School" by Leanne Payne. I read books. I worked to find healing. I saw a counselor. I have prayed and been prayed for. I been celibate. I have found guys cute but haven't felt attracted to them. I've never longed to kiss a guy.
I feel really spiritually, mentally, and emotionally healthy. For years I've thought my only option was celibacy. Which is so hard because everyone else gets to be with someone. Now I think (gay and straight alike) are called to celibacy in singleness and committed life-long monogamy in relationship. I still wrestle with scripture. Have conversations about scriptural context and lenses. I've always sought to live a God-honoring life.
I guess I need you to hear there there is a bible believing christian lesbian out there who has done everything to work this out that i could. And in the end my wrestling has led me to be open to a monogamous relationship with a woman. I would prefer to marry her.
When the factions of the church fight in the civil war that seems to be taking place over this issue I am the person standing in the middle. All I ask is that people would try not to shoot me (or anyone else) in the process.