freedomstudent7
04-25-2007, 06:36 PM
Hey guys,
I'm Katie, and I got to meet the western bound Equality Riders when they came to Portland Oregon and visited George Fox university. I actually wrote an open publishing article (tried to be unbiased, but wasn't too successful) about them for our local indy media; you know, faith perspectives are too often anti-LGBT, so I thought I'd try to be a part of getting out a different story. Funny, cuz I've never done journaling before, and was cluelessly enjoying the process of getting to know how it all goes down, though I felt a bit like an intruder, cause I was really there as an interested community member in my own process of reconciling sexuality and the tradition of my religious up-bringing.
While I was talking to Tab, this guy from CBS came up and asked if he could listen in and film. At first I was like, "no problem," then I thought about it and was like, "wait a minute, this is going to be on the 6 o'clock news? Sorry buddy." Anyway, I got my own baggage, went to Bible College for 2 years, and 5 years rejecting my primary orientation for religious reasons. Came out when I was 14, back in at 22, now 28, been slowing coming out again over the last year, though I'm still closeted in many places, family included, (my 'lil bro is out in LA, so we got each other). It's a bit more difficult and different when you've got established relationships in a community that are built around church, missions and Bible school. When I was 14, I was telling everyone to fu*k off anyway, so it seems I've got a little more to loose now. But nonetheless, I have lots of opportunities to practice coming out all the time anyway, and if I end up on the Ride next year, I'll be known by the world: a frightening but beautiful thought.
I work with people in downtown Portland Oregon who struggle with homelessness and mental illness. Have been working with youth, and in mental health since I was 19, probably not surprising that social justice is at the core of my being. I am just about to graduate from Concordia University with a degree in Social Work and a minor in theology.
My upbringing was in the evangelical free church, in a very conservative, republican household; joined the church and got baptized at 11, and then basically told them all to go to hell at 13 when I started out on my own spiritual journey.
When I was 22 I had a pretty radical transformation upon coming into communion with the Spirit of Christ, and have been a follower since. First thought I'd be a missionary, then go to Bible school, then who knows. My faith has changed a lot over the years, but at the time, I didn't know there were options other than rejecting my lesbian identity. I fought it for 5 years, tried to dress like a girl, go to sexual delivery and healing ministries, read my Bible, tried to be strong and "good" but it never did go away even when I ignored it the most, or tried to like men. I even sat on a debate panel at my school during the elections when there was a giant local controversy over gay marriage (they had started giving licenses out downtown). The vote was to amend the constitution to state that marriage was to be between a man and a woman only. I took the orthodox perspective since I had been "cured" for three years. Freaking wild!!! I usually go all the way when I make up my mind to do something, but I have probably changed directions more times in life than anyone I know (Ask me how many colleges I've attended or majors I've had!). I guess I really want to know if it's what I want to do, or if it's what I believe in, and the only way to know is to embrace it fully. I'm ok with that, though it doesn't always make life easy. ;')
I guess now I am less sure of the character of God than I ever have been. I stopped going to church last year cuz I'm sick of just getting together and patting each other on the back with all of the assumptions we make about God that end up being more about our emotions and ourselves, than reality. I moved out of the faith community I had lived in for 2 years because of the community differences and beliefs about God's purpose for relationships, and I honestly didn't really even want to go there at the time with them. I knew what they believed and what they would tell me, and why put myself through that when I was hardly making it in school already?
Faith is work. It's walking, not just talking and arguing different positions best, or even thinking one knows something; to me that is a strange idea, though at one point, it was very real for me, as I would go around injecting people with my zeal and truth, apart from God's love.
Anyway, I have been inspired by the Equality Riders, and have come to realize that if I don't put myself out there, and take the risk of being hurt and misunderstood, labeled a sick sinner, and a reprobate, many others will suffer in my place, and I have knowledge to know better, and a growing will to do the right thing even though it seems so hard.
Sorry this post is so long. I had originally wanted to find out if there were others who are thinking about going on the ride next year, so we could be talking about that, but I couldn't find any link or thread that discussed such.
I wanted to know if anyone knows how to apply and the application process. Maybe someone else knows, but I haven't been able to find info on the Soulforce website about that, and it seems that the 877 number listed is out of order, since I tried to call it twice this morning and got disconnected messages.
Ok, I'll leave it there. There's always so much more to say, and I have to remember that I don't have to say it all in the first breath. Hope I haven't overwhelmed you. Write if you're interested in rapping, and if anyone's interested in the article I wrote, here it is:
http://portland.indymedia.org/en/2007/04/357173.shtml
:)
I'm Katie, and I got to meet the western bound Equality Riders when they came to Portland Oregon and visited George Fox university. I actually wrote an open publishing article (tried to be unbiased, but wasn't too successful) about them for our local indy media; you know, faith perspectives are too often anti-LGBT, so I thought I'd try to be a part of getting out a different story. Funny, cuz I've never done journaling before, and was cluelessly enjoying the process of getting to know how it all goes down, though I felt a bit like an intruder, cause I was really there as an interested community member in my own process of reconciling sexuality and the tradition of my religious up-bringing.
While I was talking to Tab, this guy from CBS came up and asked if he could listen in and film. At first I was like, "no problem," then I thought about it and was like, "wait a minute, this is going to be on the 6 o'clock news? Sorry buddy." Anyway, I got my own baggage, went to Bible College for 2 years, and 5 years rejecting my primary orientation for religious reasons. Came out when I was 14, back in at 22, now 28, been slowing coming out again over the last year, though I'm still closeted in many places, family included, (my 'lil bro is out in LA, so we got each other). It's a bit more difficult and different when you've got established relationships in a community that are built around church, missions and Bible school. When I was 14, I was telling everyone to fu*k off anyway, so it seems I've got a little more to loose now. But nonetheless, I have lots of opportunities to practice coming out all the time anyway, and if I end up on the Ride next year, I'll be known by the world: a frightening but beautiful thought.
I work with people in downtown Portland Oregon who struggle with homelessness and mental illness. Have been working with youth, and in mental health since I was 19, probably not surprising that social justice is at the core of my being. I am just about to graduate from Concordia University with a degree in Social Work and a minor in theology.
My upbringing was in the evangelical free church, in a very conservative, republican household; joined the church and got baptized at 11, and then basically told them all to go to hell at 13 when I started out on my own spiritual journey.
When I was 22 I had a pretty radical transformation upon coming into communion with the Spirit of Christ, and have been a follower since. First thought I'd be a missionary, then go to Bible school, then who knows. My faith has changed a lot over the years, but at the time, I didn't know there were options other than rejecting my lesbian identity. I fought it for 5 years, tried to dress like a girl, go to sexual delivery and healing ministries, read my Bible, tried to be strong and "good" but it never did go away even when I ignored it the most, or tried to like men. I even sat on a debate panel at my school during the elections when there was a giant local controversy over gay marriage (they had started giving licenses out downtown). The vote was to amend the constitution to state that marriage was to be between a man and a woman only. I took the orthodox perspective since I had been "cured" for three years. Freaking wild!!! I usually go all the way when I make up my mind to do something, but I have probably changed directions more times in life than anyone I know (Ask me how many colleges I've attended or majors I've had!). I guess I really want to know if it's what I want to do, or if it's what I believe in, and the only way to know is to embrace it fully. I'm ok with that, though it doesn't always make life easy. ;')
I guess now I am less sure of the character of God than I ever have been. I stopped going to church last year cuz I'm sick of just getting together and patting each other on the back with all of the assumptions we make about God that end up being more about our emotions and ourselves, than reality. I moved out of the faith community I had lived in for 2 years because of the community differences and beliefs about God's purpose for relationships, and I honestly didn't really even want to go there at the time with them. I knew what they believed and what they would tell me, and why put myself through that when I was hardly making it in school already?
Faith is work. It's walking, not just talking and arguing different positions best, or even thinking one knows something; to me that is a strange idea, though at one point, it was very real for me, as I would go around injecting people with my zeal and truth, apart from God's love.
Anyway, I have been inspired by the Equality Riders, and have come to realize that if I don't put myself out there, and take the risk of being hurt and misunderstood, labeled a sick sinner, and a reprobate, many others will suffer in my place, and I have knowledge to know better, and a growing will to do the right thing even though it seems so hard.
Sorry this post is so long. I had originally wanted to find out if there were others who are thinking about going on the ride next year, so we could be talking about that, but I couldn't find any link or thread that discussed such.
I wanted to know if anyone knows how to apply and the application process. Maybe someone else knows, but I haven't been able to find info on the Soulforce website about that, and it seems that the 877 number listed is out of order, since I tried to call it twice this morning and got disconnected messages.
Ok, I'll leave it there. There's always so much more to say, and I have to remember that I don't have to say it all in the first breath. Hope I haven't overwhelmed you. Write if you're interested in rapping, and if anyone's interested in the article I wrote, here it is:
http://portland.indymedia.org/en/2007/04/357173.shtml
:)