View Full Version : A second chance at love
05-07-2007, 10:00 AM
Hello to all of my dear friends here: Although I could not have seen this in my future, because I had given up all hope, my ex partner and I are going to try to work things out. We have been talking constantly in the last few days, and have mutually decided that with each other is where we belong, and that we need to work hard, and even do things a little bit differently, so that we can keep the communication open. It has been a long, hard year for both of us, but many essential lessons learned for each in the process. I had given up ALL hope that she would ever want a reconciliation, and was just creating a new, different life for myself, what I call the "new normal". We will have newness to us as well, because we know what didn't work about how we conducted our life, but realized a lot did work as well. We are revisiting our strong foundation and keeping the lines of communication fully open. THat is the key. We both have such a sense of peace about this decision, no fear, just certainty that God has intervened and we need to trust in it. I understand the lessons of the last year, and the lessons both of us have learned will help us to grow and change together, as individuals and as one.
As some of my closest, dearest friends, I wanted to let you all know, and to also thank you, from the bottom of my grateful heart, for all of the support, encouragement, prayers and love that you have so selflessly offered during these tough months. I am bursting here!!!!
My love and prayers of peace to all of you, Vanessa :love: :love: :love: :love: :love: :love: :love: :love: :love: :love:
05-07-2007, 10:02 AM
That is awesome! I wish you both the best.
05-07-2007, 10:10 AM
that's great news Vanessa. Such experiences of Grace are few and far between. All the best to both of you.
May I suggest that right now when everything is all fresh and new and there are no "issues" currently on the table between the two of you would be an EXCELLENT time to bring in the skills of a disinterested third party (a relationship/couple therapist) to help you develop new communication skills to undergird and strengthen your new relationship? :)
Just an idea. I know that its expensive but... how much is "happily ever after" worth? Quite a lot I should think. :love:
05-07-2007, 10:40 AM
:weee: :weee: :weee: I'm so happy for you Vanessa!!!!! I know that this last year really has been hard on you... so I'm glad to hear that things are going to be better!!! :weee: :weee: :weee:
05-07-2007, 11:24 AM
It sounds like you are quite happy, and I'm happy for you. Just keep it real and if you do that, it should work out just fine. I agree with Dave, a neutral third party is always a great idea. Lots of changes for you, past, present and future! The sun is shining on you Vanessa!
I wish you much luck, love and peace. Go girl! :love: :D
Ah... this is very good news! :)
05-07-2007, 12:45 PM
You are kissed by Love herself.
05-07-2007, 01:11 PM
:rolleyes: FINALLY! :rolleyes:
05-07-2007, 01:23 PM
Thanks to you all, loving friends, for your unconditional support and positive regard. We are discussing various ways to walk into the future in a more healthy way, so I don't think a third party is out of the question. What a difference a year makes, and seeking out our own individual destinies. I will keep you all posted. I feel your warm embraces........:love:
05-07-2007, 03:17 PM
(((((( Vanessa! ))))))
:) :rainbow: :love: :) :rainbow: :love: :) :rainbow: :love:
Oh Vanessa, what exciting news!!!! I'm so happy to hear that you two have had a "second chance!!"
I was going to suggest what Dave did - that you invest in some sessions with a neutral 3rd party counsellor, to go over the kinds of traps that you two dealt with in the past unsuccessfully, and how you can cope successfully if those same kinds of challenges occur in the future. Knowing how to cope with relationship issues, keeping communication open, is so key. Not to mention, I'm sure you both learned so much this past year, that will show you how to avoid those pitfalls and stay in that wonderful Honeymoon whirl of romance. ;)
Congratulations Vanessa, and all the best to both of you at this new beginning.
:love: :love: :love: :love: :love: :love: :love:
05-08-2007, 09:31 PM
I am so happy for you and your partner. I agree with everyone else, sometimes a third party can be extremely helpful and can make you see things you wouldn't normally see because you are so close to the situation or person.
My wife and I had known each other for 13 years before becoming intimate and although we had been friends, this whole new aspect of our relationship came with a whole new set of expectations that neither of us were prepared to deal with. Friends was one thing, lovers was a whole different ballgame. To put it in a nutshell, I left her once (for two years), she left me once (for 3 weeks) and we have been through things most marriages don't experience. We ended up going to a counselor for gay couples and it really helped both us see that we had to learn to forgive and put things in the past and bury it. We had to build a future together and create a common dream for both of us.
Whatever happens I wish you the best and may God grant you both peace and assurance that this is where you belong. The fact that you and she can't seem to say goodbye to each other, says a lot about how much you love each other. Sometimes love is all you have, and sometimes it is all you need. Peace and love to you and your partner. :weee:
05-10-2007, 09:34 AM
Vanessa -- this is wonderful, wonderful news! I'm so very happy for you and your partner. :love: :pray: :)
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