jd_1983
04-10-2008, 09:07 PM
Hello everyone. My name is Jonathan from Dallas, TX. My story is a little different in that I began both my spiritual journey and my coming-out journey later in life (at age 32). Sorry if this is a bit long, but I've been feeling like a stranger in a strange land, when it comes to reconciling my personal values with the gay and Christian communities.
I grew up in a mainly progressive/liberal community, but was not involved with any church or organized religion. I moved to Dallas to accept a really good job offer, and found that religion loomed much larger on the social landscape here. Still before my coming-out journey, I began attending one of the more progressive Methodist churches in town.
Finally, I was ready for my coming-out journey. It became obvious to me over a 6-12 month period that I was attracted to men much more than women. Fortunately, I did not have a spiritual crisis as the church I was attending welcomed gay members and regularly taught a progressive Christian tradition. However, I found myself in a strange position -- being the gay guy all the straight people loved! Many of the gay members were from an upper-income group and didn't particularly welcome me into their circles.
So, I moved on to a much larger gay-affirming church. I have been happy with the faith message and social climate there; I look forward to attending every Sunday. I have several friends I respect and look up to there, and have gotten involved in several enjoyable social groups as well.
This week, however, I had some thoughts that almost drove me into the arms of the ex-gay movement:
- There are rumors that a minister at my church has a partner of 20+ years, but justified his outside exploits (including group encounters) by saying he had an "open relationship." What about those of us who are called to a monogamous relationship?
- My church and several other religious institutions in Dallas offer holy unions, but I don't exactly see guys stampeding to get married, if only in spirit.
- At my old church, the gay people would hardly give me the time of day, let alone extend the hand of friendship. I don't know exactly why but suspect it had something to do with looks and/or money.
- On the political side, there seems to be a lot of pressure to come out, but no community resources to help people who lose their homes, jobs, college educations, etc. if they do.
- Some of the concepts of godliness and confidence mentioned by our opponents struck a chord with me. I have met several straight guys involved with Evangelical churches or ministries, and I have always admired the confidence and "togetherness" they exude. We need someone to teach a gay-affirming version of these concepts at a personal level. Our opponents are teaching these concepts, but with the intent of turning us straight.
Fortunately, I regained my senses and found this forum. I feel much better about being gay, but I think we all (myself included) have some work to do to bring out the best in ourselves, both as gay people and as Christians.
Thank you for reading and understanding.
Jonathan
I grew up in a mainly progressive/liberal community, but was not involved with any church or organized religion. I moved to Dallas to accept a really good job offer, and found that religion loomed much larger on the social landscape here. Still before my coming-out journey, I began attending one of the more progressive Methodist churches in town.
Finally, I was ready for my coming-out journey. It became obvious to me over a 6-12 month period that I was attracted to men much more than women. Fortunately, I did not have a spiritual crisis as the church I was attending welcomed gay members and regularly taught a progressive Christian tradition. However, I found myself in a strange position -- being the gay guy all the straight people loved! Many of the gay members were from an upper-income group and didn't particularly welcome me into their circles.
So, I moved on to a much larger gay-affirming church. I have been happy with the faith message and social climate there; I look forward to attending every Sunday. I have several friends I respect and look up to there, and have gotten involved in several enjoyable social groups as well.
This week, however, I had some thoughts that almost drove me into the arms of the ex-gay movement:
- There are rumors that a minister at my church has a partner of 20+ years, but justified his outside exploits (including group encounters) by saying he had an "open relationship." What about those of us who are called to a monogamous relationship?
- My church and several other religious institutions in Dallas offer holy unions, but I don't exactly see guys stampeding to get married, if only in spirit.
- At my old church, the gay people would hardly give me the time of day, let alone extend the hand of friendship. I don't know exactly why but suspect it had something to do with looks and/or money.
- On the political side, there seems to be a lot of pressure to come out, but no community resources to help people who lose their homes, jobs, college educations, etc. if they do.
- Some of the concepts of godliness and confidence mentioned by our opponents struck a chord with me. I have met several straight guys involved with Evangelical churches or ministries, and I have always admired the confidence and "togetherness" they exude. We need someone to teach a gay-affirming version of these concepts at a personal level. Our opponents are teaching these concepts, but with the intent of turning us straight.
Fortunately, I regained my senses and found this forum. I feel much better about being gay, but I think we all (myself included) have some work to do to bring out the best in ourselves, both as gay people and as Christians.
Thank you for reading and understanding.
Jonathan