antiochian
01-27-2009, 02:44 PM
Dear Friends,
Once again I find myself pouring my heart out to you. My interim class is Christianity and Culture. We have discussed many moral issues and two weeks ago the gay issue came up. Prof is very conservative, and some of the students are as well.
I was not going to let this opportunity slide. I prepared a speech before class that day, and about halfway through the session, nervous as hell, I said I needed to say something and I let them have it (up to that point we'd gone over the same old verses and heard the same old crap). I came out to them, told them of my personal struggles and pain that came from the perception culture and church have of lgbt people. I told them the church is driving people away, and needs to do something different if they are going to reach our community with God's message of love. I said the Bible is so full of mystery, and that we should be very careful before thinking we have it figured out. It took about five minutes. Afterwards, I cried for most of the rest of class, and was shaking. I wanted to leave.
When class ended, another student asked to speak with me. He's a devout christian, so I wasn't sure what to expect. My defenses were up. We sat down and he came out to me. We cried and talked for an hour. He said we should talk again sometime. There was a very real feeling of having connected.
Here's the problem. I like the guy, I really like him. He's kind and compassionate, full of spunk, and physically attractive. He's probably 21-23, a little younger than I am. I can't quit thinking about him, and I've avoided talking to him or even making eye contact with him because I'm so scared. Bad idea, I know, but I am really scared. Whether he feels the same, I have no idea.
Tomorrow is the last day of this class. I have to talk to him again. I don't know how to go about it exactly. I want to share my feelings, be honest with him without scaring him off. It's not about wanting sex, it's about my feeling deeply connected to his loving spirit and wanting to know him better. Religiously, we are obviously not a match. I don't know what to make of that, but that can't stop us from being friends. But I have to do or say something, or I know I'll regret it. In the worst case scenario, he'll freak, but I think he's more mature than that. I just don't know what to do. Help!!! :love:
Having said that, I am so glad I came out to that class. The professor thanked me, and I've had no troubles with harassment or anything. My classmates have been very respectful. Perhaps I sowed a seed or two and will give them something to think about.
Once again I find myself pouring my heart out to you. My interim class is Christianity and Culture. We have discussed many moral issues and two weeks ago the gay issue came up. Prof is very conservative, and some of the students are as well.
I was not going to let this opportunity slide. I prepared a speech before class that day, and about halfway through the session, nervous as hell, I said I needed to say something and I let them have it (up to that point we'd gone over the same old verses and heard the same old crap). I came out to them, told them of my personal struggles and pain that came from the perception culture and church have of lgbt people. I told them the church is driving people away, and needs to do something different if they are going to reach our community with God's message of love. I said the Bible is so full of mystery, and that we should be very careful before thinking we have it figured out. It took about five minutes. Afterwards, I cried for most of the rest of class, and was shaking. I wanted to leave.
When class ended, another student asked to speak with me. He's a devout christian, so I wasn't sure what to expect. My defenses were up. We sat down and he came out to me. We cried and talked for an hour. He said we should talk again sometime. There was a very real feeling of having connected.
Here's the problem. I like the guy, I really like him. He's kind and compassionate, full of spunk, and physically attractive. He's probably 21-23, a little younger than I am. I can't quit thinking about him, and I've avoided talking to him or even making eye contact with him because I'm so scared. Bad idea, I know, but I am really scared. Whether he feels the same, I have no idea.
Tomorrow is the last day of this class. I have to talk to him again. I don't know how to go about it exactly. I want to share my feelings, be honest with him without scaring him off. It's not about wanting sex, it's about my feeling deeply connected to his loving spirit and wanting to know him better. Religiously, we are obviously not a match. I don't know what to make of that, but that can't stop us from being friends. But I have to do or say something, or I know I'll regret it. In the worst case scenario, he'll freak, but I think he's more mature than that. I just don't know what to do. Help!!! :love:
Having said that, I am so glad I came out to that class. The professor thanked me, and I've had no troubles with harassment or anything. My classmates have been very respectful. Perhaps I sowed a seed or two and will give them something to think about.