totally off topic -- planes flying into buildings dreams

[suzer1013]

OK, this isn't really a Soulforce type topic, but I'm curious.

After 9/11, I've often had recurring nightmares about planes flying into buildings. My partner says she's never had such dreams. Does anyone else experience this?

I used to work on the 45th floor of one of the tallest buildings in Atlanta (SunTrust Plaza). On 9/11, everyone in my office was white with fear, thinking we might be next. After that, our building held regular emergency drills, where we had to walk down all 45 flights (actually more like 50 to actually get to ground level) as if it were a real emergency. I understand the need for such drills, but I always was imagining those poor folks at the WTC rushing down the stairs. Even a drill in non-emergency conditions was sort of scary.

We moved to a different building in 2004 -- now we are on the 20th floor across the street -- a much easier walk down and less of a target. Every time a plane or helicopter flew by in the other building, we would all tense up. A couple weeks ago, though, we had a bomb scare -- a real one (turned out to be nothing in the end -- an electronic dog collar someone ordered and a receptionist panicked) -- SWAT teams, sirens, police all over. And here we thought we were safer on the 20th floor! IT all ended up ok, but it was sort of scary when it happened.

I don't want to live in this kind of anxiety, but perhaps it's just a reality of modern life. I mean, I don't usually feel anxious in every day life (not about terrorism anyway), but it comes out in my dreams.

Anyway -- anyone else have these kind of nightmares?

Susan

[Zerbie]

Yes, but not about terrorism. Very different things.

Have you done a little research into PTSD? it sounds like you might have a mild case of it - now that a few years have gone by and you are still having these symptoms, you probably want to take steps to get a handle on the symptoms. Start by googling PTSD, read what various sites have to say, and see if it sounds like it might describe your experience. Take a look at suggested coping techniques. Often, therapy is recommended. If you decide to go the therapeutic route, ask for someone experienced with PTSD.

As to the emergency drills, no wonder you are getting re-scared every time they happen.
A- part of you is reliving that day when you were all on the 45th floor white with terror that it would happen to you. You believed you could really face death that day, and yes, that is terrifying!

B - your mind takes you back to that day every time you have a drill.

This might be very difficult, but next time you are walking downstairs in a drill, try with all your might NOT to imagine the 9/11 victims. It's my opinion that you've 'gone there' more than enough times. Stay in the present time and place. Focus on the healthy, living people safely strolling downstairs with you. Stay present. Touch the railings and notice what they feel like, anything to keep focused on the present. Remind yourself what the present reality is.

Those are my suggestions. You will find more and better ones too. Start with a google search on PTSD. Many people developed PTSD symptoms in the months and year (s) after 9/11, it's not unusual at all. If you think you might have it, take steps to ameliorate it NOW, because it often escalates and becomes worse.

You can PM me if you want to talk more in depth about these things.

[Daniel]

Only in waking life. My husband and I were listening to the radio here in NYC the morning of 9/11 and heard the news of the towers being hit by a plane. On came CNN. I tried to get in touch with a friend who would be traveling in the subway under the towers on her way from Brooklyn at that time and he biked down to the 72nd St pier and got there just in time to see the first tower emit a bright flash of light and collapse. Later that evening, when the wind changed direction, we got a whiff of what would be with us for the next six months.

In the days and months after, I found my heart racing to the sound of military jets overhead and to this day look up when a plane flies overhead and wonder where it is going.

[suzer1013]

Zerbie -- that's interesting -- I hadn't made any kind of PTSD connection myself, but there could very well be some PTSD involved. I have done therapy before (many years), and was actually in therapy during and after 9/11, though we really didn't focus on that too much.

I lived in Brooklyn for a few years, and had a view of the WTC from my brownstone. It was beautiful all lit up at night, peeking through fog some days -- it was just majestic and beautiful. I was in NYC during the 1993 attack -- our office was evacuated and we all were sent home on packed subway trains (I worked near the Empire State Building, and most offices around it were closed down that day). Also, my cousin was on her way to the World FInancial Center where she worked on 9/11. She managed to call her parents and let us know she was o.k. Normally, she got off the subway at the WTC, but that morning she was running late. She got off at Rector Street and walked toward work, thinking things weren't as bad as they were. She ended up witnessing some horrifying things, then had to walk home to Queens.

So, I have this connection to it that is certainly more removed than those who actually suffered through it, but there may be some good reasons my mind has some anxiety over it. I'll look into some more stuff about PTSD. This isn't keeping me from living my life, or from work or anything, it's just the dreams are a bit disturbing.

Daniel -- I can only imagine what it was like to live in NYC during and after 9/11. New Yorkers are amazingly resilient, though -- a tough, but loving crowd when catastrophe strikes. Glad you made it through o.k. :pray: :love:

Susan

[Dash]

One year after 9/11, around August or September, I dreamed that I was in Oklahoma City looking up at a skyscraper in a strong wind. It began to sway back and forth and I realized with horror that it was going to fall. I watched it go, not straight down on itself as the World Trade Center towers did, but sideways, crashing with a dreadfully recognizable cloud of grey dust. In the aftermath, the streets were jammed with cars as everyone tried desperately to leave the city

When I woke from the nightmare, my basic thought was, "That doesn't bode well!" I was moving to Chicago on September 20th. As it turned out, I ended up being out of work for about 6 weeks. I had thought I had a job lined up, but that fell through, so my move was not as financially stable as I had planned.

Very often the telling of a dream is its own meaning. The destruction of the World Trade Center has been assimilated into the archetypal language of my psyche. It speaks to me of the fragility of my financial world.

Of course, I wouldn’t try to tell you what your dreams mean. You're really the only person who can know the personal language of your soul. It's all about how you respond to your world. But, telling your dreams to someone...writing them down...being aware of the words you are using... You can learn a lot. Even writing my own dream above, after all this time, has taught me more about how my soul spoke to me then.

I have not had a recurring dream for a long time. Those that I have experienced represented, for me, unresolved internal issues. Nightmares of snakes for many, many years ended when I (don't laugh) began to accept and appreciate my homosexuality. (I...said...don't...laugh!) A recurring dream that put me back in high school unable to open my locker ended one happy summer when I, then a college student, worked with a high school kid named Richard. He was the first real friend I'd opened up to since 5th grade.

Interestingly, the recurring dreams both indicated their own resolutions. In the locker dream, the janitor came by in the last one and used her key to open it. The last time I was threatened by a snake in a dream, I was standing by a river, and looking down, I seemed to grow in stature...or perhaps, the snake shrank...I reached down with my thumb and crushed its head.

Anyway, these are just some examples of how I work with my own dreams as they speak to me. You're aware of your dreams, which I think is a good thing. They may be disturbing, but at least you are listening to your own internal dialogue.

[Zerbie]

.

I have not had a recurring dream for a long time. Those that I have experienced represented, for me, unresolved internal issues. Nightmares of snakes for many, many years ended when I (don't laugh) began to accept and appreciate my homosexuality. (I...said...don't...laugh!)

.

Sorry. :o Couldn't help myself. . .the way you tell it!. . .:D

Totally logical, though. :agree:

So, I have a recurring dream for 10 years now. I'm good at reading dream clues and knowing what's up in my head, but this one stymies me. Should we start a new thread on dream interp? And leave this one to deal with the 9/11 stuff? I want new ideas about my recurring dream from y'all - but don't wanna hijack Suze's thread.

[Daniel]

Dash makes an important point. Like him, I had my own frightening dreams around the acceptence of my sexuality- and this was after I had had two major relationships. In my case, I dreamt of a devouring vampire- more Nosferatu and than Bela Lugosi- and woke up night after night in a cold sweat.

Zerbie: Why not start here? Carpe Diem!

A friend suggested a way to work with dreams and I've found the practice to be illuminating and even, if I may say so, a little fun. It makes for great breakfast conversation. Of course, this is only one way to go about the matter.

1. Keep a pad and pen/pencil near your bed.
2. On the pad, divide the paper into two columns.
3. When you wake from a dream, write down on one side of the paper all the 'stuff' of the dream, as in: plane, darkness, building, crash, fire etc etc.
4. One the other side of the paper, write done how you you felt before you went to sleep, how you felt during the dream and how you felt upon awakening.
5. Let yourself free associate between the two columns. With time, one starts to get a handle on the difference between the archetypal images and the personal ones. To me, this always feels like one is doing a cosmic crossword puzzle. And I'm sometimes surprised that my brain will work on the 'problem' well into the day and the 'answer' will pop into my head unexpectedly.

I found two things helped the process; one being that I left myself do the interp in the morning if I woke in the middle of the night (you can have more than one dream a night that wakes you up and who wants to all that heavy lifting interp work in the dead of night?) and it's Ok to write big in the dark!

[Zerbie]

Thanks Daniel.

A good idea. I did that for years. I had to stop dream journaling when I began *dreaming* that I woke up to write the dreams down.:rolleyes: Got to be looking at myself looking at myself so ridiculously much!

Regards the Nosferatu dreams - that sounds so frightening! I'm sorry. :( I didn't think of it before now, but such dreams sound as if they might be common in our "community." Anyone else??

I had some terrifying dreams about my sexuality too, come ta think of it. Between roughly ages 15 and 23. The first was the scariest. A gorgeous, sexy, but totally deranged woman who is no part of the normal world, is trying to get into my house. (hmmm, imagery!) She approaches first the front door, I barricade it and put all the furniture behind so she can't break through with force. Then barricade the back door. But it turns out that she has a key, and she uses the key to get in the garage. The wildwoman lubricates a key and inserts it into the lock, and I am holding the doorknob by the opposite side, crying. She opens the door, enters the house, and reaches for me. I wake up both frightened and aroused. There was never any doubt she was my mind's construction of a lesbian. And/or of my own sexual responses towards other women that I was trying to shut out. I refused to acknowledge my attraction to women for several more years.

When I finally began to acknowledge it, I had recurring dreams of maimed, mutilated, crippled goddesses. Sometimes realistic women, other times marble statues of women, all of them with the eyes put out, no arms. Missing legs. Things like that. I was so frightened to see the blind, armless goddesses in the dreams! As I began to openly acknowledge my sexuality, they subsided. I began having dreams of finding a mutilated or crippled lesbian at the side of the road, picking her up into my arms, and carrying her. Seemed obvious that she was me.

Anyone else see their coming out reflected in dreams?

And, maybe this needs to be its own thread. ???

[Daniel]

Regards the Nosferatu dreams - that sounds so frightening! I'm sorry. :( I didn't think of it before now, but such dreams sound as if they might be common in our "community."

Zerbie- your deranged woman getting into your house dream! Ahhhhhhh! That would have woken me up screaming. Re my own Nosferatu: he got banished when he got caught in the Light.

[Zerbie]

Zerbie- your deranged woman getting into your house dream! Ahhhhhhh! That would have woken me up screaming. Re my own Nosferatu: he got banished when he got caught in the Light.


Well, she scared me a great deal at the time! But come ta think of it, at least she was attractive - your Nosferatu, uh uh. :disagree: No thank you!

That pic you posted, Nosferatu a looming shadow in the hallway, is so freakin' terrifying!!!!! It's those creepy fingers that really does it. Oh. My. God. that visual scares me to death!

So glad I didn't have your nightmares! I'll take my long-haired, half-naked wildwoman over Nosferatu anytime, thanks. ;)

[tdogg]

During my relationship with my ex husband (a huge 17.5 years most of which were not happy years) - I had recurring dreams of people putting dead bodies that had been murdered in my house, car, etc., and I was left to dispose of the bodies so the authorities wouldn't think I killed them. It was horrible! I never had them prior to starting that relationship and haven't had one since I left him. Not sure if it's related to my coming out, just being in a bad relationship??

I did an enormous amount of personal growing on many levels during the time with him and for a couple years after. I sort of interpreted it as the old me being done away with and the new me emerging finally after all that time, so the dreams were no longer necessary. I told the dream to a friend who knows a bit about interpreting dreams and she thought it might mean that something had died (such as affection for him) and when he was out of my life the dreams ceased.

I also dream in vivid color and have some amazing ones, a few of which have stayed with me through many years.

[Zerbie]

T -

Those dead people in your dreams may have been parts of yourself that temporarily "died" while you were in a relationship where those parts of yourself weren't fully available/able to express themselves.

?

[tdogg]

T -

Those dead people in your dreams may have been parts of yourself that temporarily "died" while you were in a relationship where those parts of yourself weren't fully available/able to express themselves.

?

That's a good interpretation Z and one I haven't visited yet, well, other than the possibility it was the 'love' I had for my ex that was dying. Not sure love is the word, it was an affection I might have for a friend or cousin, combined with pity. Parts of me definitely were dead in that relationship.

I often wonder about my desperate need to conceal the bodies in those dreams. If it happened in real life, my instincts would be to go straight to the authorities - immediately. Perhaps it was an attempt to keep my loved ones from knowing that parts of me died??

Anyway, just relieved I don't have them anymore and haven't for 4 years now!!! (Oh, and I just love my 'flying' dreams!!!)

[Zerbie]

. Parts of me definitely were dead in that relationship.

I often wonder about my desperate need to conceal the bodies in those dreams. If it happened in real life, my instincts would be to go straight to the authorities - immediately. Perhaps it was an attempt to keep my loved ones from knowing that parts of me died??



My immediate thought was this: that it was a desperate attempt to keep yourself from noticing that those parts of you had died. If you noticed, you would have to acknowledge it and do something about it, like end the relationship. And that kind of step is scary. You may have been hiding it from yourself.

Just a guess, fwiw.