Hello my name is Ash
Okay so I'm not new at all to this forum, but I wanted to share a wonderful thing that happened just now.
My beloved Adrain, Holder of my heart spirit, showed me something. His gift today is one of allowing me to release the blindness my judgemental mind has prevented me from knowing.
I mentioned that I did not feel comfortable calling myself a Radical Faerie yet as I did not feel that my awareness of my heart was sufficiently developed.
Adrain: "you do yourself and other Faeries a tremendous disservice by thinking and saying that."
Ash (me): "But My best definition of a Radical Faerie is having the connection of awareness to our Faerie Queer Heart."
Adrain: "There are many who call themselves Faeries who Don't have the connection you do."
Ash: "But I still have so much disconnection from my heart"
Adrain: "And where does that heart Thrive the most intensely? Where do you say you want to live?"
Ash: "Short Mountain."
Adrain: "So do you have the heart of a Faerie?"
Ash "I guess I do! Adrain! I've been A Radical Faerie all the time! I am a Radical Faerie! My Judgemental mind has Blinded me to it! So I'll just ackowledge and bow to my Judgemental mind.....'Thank you very much for your opinion, but I am a Radical Faerie already!' "
Adrain "Now that's a good Faerie!"
Ash: "I love you Adrain!"
Adrain: "I love you too Ash!"
So Today I acknowleged that I am a Radical faerie!:weee::weee:
Welcome to Soulforce; Ash, the radical Faerie! You honor us with your presence. I once heard a wise person say that 'Home is where the heart is.' :)
You actually brought a tear to this old queers eyes. Thanks for sharing Scotty Ash.
Thank you guys
So Wonderful to be able to share and receive genuine compassion reflected back.
This morning I'm allowing my awaress to to me to feel compassion for myself, for my friends here at Soulforce, for my neighbors and relatives who have struggled with their homophobia and guilt for having such feelings.
Even for my Judgemental mind which I believe needs the most compassion and virtually never gets it. My judgemental mind feels inadequate and fearful. That's why it is judgemental. I open my arms to the judgemental mind reassuring it.
To my Judgemental mind:
"You have done your best. You have taken the brunt of my fear, the false messages of others, and bore the brunt of the wounds inflicted by homophobia. Now I embrace you with love and compassion and gratitude."
"I forgive you without hesitation or reservation. It is time to come home. There is nothing more to fear from the past. The is no inadequacy to compensate for. You and I can integrate with compassion, without conflict and without fear. Welcome home. Sanctuary is here within."
In my mind I extend my compassion and love to my love circle. To Adrain and Gyver, to Otter and Phillip, to Sapphire wherever he is, to Puppy and To Petshop. I extend my compassion to the Faeries on Short Mountain and everywhere.
I extend my compassion to the members here at Soulforce To the present and past Equality riders. I extend compassion to Labguy, Daniel, Zerbie, BrianB, Keltic, Kara, MCstudent and Uncle Andy. I extend my compassion the the others who post here. And to those who summon just enough courage to surf this site but fear to do more.
I extend my compassion to those who made choices they regret. I extend compssion to those young adolescents who are struggling with the fear of inadequacy.
I extend compassion to those whose fearful minds cause them to prey on Gays and offer a message: There is a better way, The way of compassion. Follow the way of compassion and you will find forgiveness and lovingkindness.
Welcome Radical Faerie. Welcome to mindfulness and opening of your heart. May you be happy and loved your whole life.
Below is my response to overwhelming affirmation by Buddhist leaders worldwide to Gays. We are simply "Third Nature" or "Trtiya Prakti" and just as much part of the fellowship "Sangha" as any in Zen, and other Buddhist traditions.
Wow! I can tell you that my heart mortified when I saw all the links and I was tempted not to click on them for fear of reading messages of rejection.
I am glad that I did read them However as I found affirmation from all over this planet in them.
This affirmation was also complimented by Konchog Dorje's very practical interpretation of the third precept's historical cricumstances of it's application:
" My own guess is that same-sex sexualities are not mentioned because they just weren't as important as heterosexuality. Before birth control, before access to safe abortion, every heterosexual act had and has the potential to create to create a life, a pregnancy, a child that would have to be taken care of until it was an adult. Also, in cultures and times when women were thought of as wards of men to the point of often being little better than chattel, inapproriate heterosexual activity could be thought of as a kind of theft, with the potential to cause disruptive ramifications and ill will throughout the community."
But I was unprepared for What was written in Shravasti Dhammika's blog:
" According to the ancient Indian understanding, homosexuals were thought of simply as being ‘the third nature’ (trtiya prakti), rather than as perverted, deviant or sick."
This hit me like a rogue wave in the surf grabbing my body with thrilling kinetc energy. If you have ever surfed, you know what I mean!
"Trtiya prakti," Radach Sidhhe" (Gaelic) AND "Radical Faerie" all mean the same thing! I am awash in a wave of affirmation of Karmic convergence this day!
Thank you for today's gift of enlightenment! :bow:
Love and affirmation.
I LOVE the reinvented look of your avatar. Smashing. :award:
May I ask: what links? I don't see them, and would be very interested.
Hi, Ash. I'm very happy that you connected with your inner self.
Sounds wonderful! I'm glad that you have made this discovery!
...and thank-you for posting this, I knew that I remembered the screen name, but I was finding myself confused about it. I remember Scotty:cowboy: and until I read this, I didn't connect the dots that you were in-fact the same person :headbang:
Hi there Ash,
Congrats on your newfound enlightenment! Newfound, profound. You certainly have the main ingredient to life - it's all about the love. I wish you much love, lovingkindness, and joy in your life. Your words are always a treat for me. :love::)
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