[tdogg]

Hi Ken! You have come to the right place to find others going through similar circumstances as yourself.

Mine is similar to Daniel and Keltic - I have a handful of close family members from whom I am emotionally estranged. My stepmother, who used to call me a few times a week, never calls. She has huge issues with me being a lesbian and in a relationship. My father has no control over his life, he is a stroke victim in a wheelchair virtually unable to communicate. Although he has met my partner and seems to really like her, I can't be sure he understands completely, or that if he had his mental faculties he would or wouldn't have issues. Of course they are A of G, fundmentalists. I have a sister who also attends the same church, and after coming out to her, I'm pretty much out of the family. We do see each other now and then and she's very sweet, always gives me hugs and says she loves me. But of course the subject of 'gay' never comes up, they can't bring themselves to talk about it, or my relationship or my partner, much less mention her name.

I too am not welcome to their homes with my partner, we are not welcome around the children. I haven't seen my sisters kids in nearly 2 years. I don't see my dad much, although it's ok for me to go to their house alone. As I don't care to spend functions or holidays away from the person I love, I choose not to attend without her. When I am in conversations with them, I don't leave out any part of my life should a subject come up - I talk about 'us', what we are doing, mention my partners name, etc.

I also have an aunt and I was quite close to her. Like a third mother. We haven't spoken in over a year. Of course this is because I'm gay and in a relationship, and was not open to her attempts to 'save me'. Like Paul says, they always know us better than we know ourselves (in their mind anyway!). I choose to cease communication and to not put up with what I felt was abuse. Recently she send me a simple email that she loves me, I responded likewise and that's it.

I have a friend who, after I came out to her, send me her last words of "may God have mercy on your soul." Nothing else from her.

Otherwise, I have a large group of supportive, loving and accepting friends and family. Although sometimes it does hurt in regards to the others, my supportive family pretty much does it for me. I don't miss the others all that much really.