Originally Posted by BrentRichards
I do know that I run into gay men all the time who have a serious bad attitude about bisexuality ... in effect, they don't believe it exists ... it's just "code" for "I'm gay and don't want to admit it." Clearly, the B in LGBT is what used to be called the "ugly red-headed step-child" of the movement. (No offense intended to the differently-beautiful, the red-headed, or step-children ... it was not a nice expression, but it's fitting here, as there's no justification for either exclusion) I have the emotional sense that I would find it difficult to be in a relationship with a bi man, but I think that's because I'm overwhelmed at the idea of how many more people could potentially steal him from me. I truly think that our attitudes toward bisexuality are one of the big internal road blocks in our community right now. So, I try to be consciously careful about projecting my "stuff" onto bisexual people ... I pretended to like girls to hide my orientation, but that doesn't mean that every guy who likes men is "pretending" when he also likes women. (Of course I'm using "like" euphemistically here, I like women just fine ...) It's the same problem "they" have with "us" ... If I don't "get it" it can't be okay. We can't afford to have "us" and "us" divided over not "getting" each other!
Can you imagine how it sucked to come out as bisexual and hope to find a date? Quite the opposite of the famous quip about twice as many dates - more like, less than HALF as many dates. Between the homophobes, the lesbians who think bisexuals are going to betray them, and the guys who are ONLY interested 'cuz they think you're gonna let them watch you with another girl or something, AAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
The wonderful thing about when things started getting serious with my husband was, I thought I'd better come out to him, so I made this big announcement and he just raised an eyebrow and said, "This is supposed to be news??? I knew you were bisexual the day I met you."
Yes, we exist. Of course we're capable of making commitments, and no we aren't lying when we say we're attracted to both genders.