Quote:
Originally Posted by JCLove
My mother and I are have disagreements. But this all began to happen when I told her I was gay. Also she seems be more in favor of my 15 year old brother(I'm 17) rather than treat us equally. What should I do, because I want to leave but I have no place to go?  |
Take heart You have three things on your side: Love truth and youth.
You also have us.
Love is connection to your inner spirit, to God and to the other shining boy who shares your heart.
Truth is what your are giving yourself by living true to your nature. You are a shining boy entitled to the joy of passionate love. God smiles when you enjoy his gift much like a parent watching a child opening presents at Christmas. From this comes the limitless power to overcome any obstacles.
Youth is the brimming vitality that will push through the hardest of resistance.
Your mother is acting out of fear. This can weaken her enough to commit desperate acts. Fear is the spirit disconnector, and without connection your mother may act against her nature which is normally nurturing.
Try meeting her fear with compassion. Ackowledge her fear and reassure her that love will relieve her fear if she lets it in. But also remind her that if she does not let in love and acceptance that her fear wiil grow.
Tell her of the love you feel for your boyfriend. Tell her it is God bringing the two of you together. Tell her that this is a joy that she could be sharing. She has a choice. She can choose to feed into her fear of a vengeful idea of God or she can open her heart to the many ways that God creates love. Ask her which feels better. An idea that God intends for you to love in the way the feelings in your heart tell you, Or God gave you these feelings so that He can get predatory gratification by you suffering because God likes to play cruel games. Which idea feels better. Which idea feels more God-like and which feels like a miserable human who is acting out of hate and fear.
You will win and so will she when she lets go of her fear, a fear that a predatory religious homophobe traumatized her with as a child. It is the traumatized child that is talking to you not an adult. Help her. You are already spiritually and emotionally more mature than she. You are the stronger. She is the weaker.
Tell her you will be patient, but that she must not trespass against you spiritually, regardless of the reason, even if she feels it's for your own good because of her belief, for this is committing a sin against her own flesh. And if she does trespass against you spiritually, turn your other cheek,
literally, to her so that perhaps she can see what she has done and say to her ""you may strike me again if you feel you need to and I will forgive you." Lead by example of nonviolence.
It may be best to write this in your own words in a letter. Her fear will make comprehension difficult and she may need to read it several times to get the meaning.
You will win. It is inevitable, but it may not be easy.. Good things are often hard won, which empasizes their value even more. I will include both you, AJ, and your families in my spiritual meditation circle This Monday at 6:00 EST Let me Know if You feel the connection. Stay in touch with us. We are here for you
Namaste