Originally Posted by chuck2pastor
Scotty, if I could give you a hug right now, I would. Thank you for sharing that with me and the whole group.
Because of the group's comments, I see that what I want and need is a separation/divorce from my wife, a conclusion I have resisted because I felt so selfish in wanting a life for myself, away from the emotional abuse she has given me. I have been wrestling with this for quite some time now, so this decision is not being made lightly or quickly and carrying it out will not be done lightly or quickly either. I will take my time and do the best by my wife that I can while keeping my own interests in mind as well. I dare say I will need a lot of help with this as time goes on. Thank you to all.
This is a tough decision. My partner (now husband) of 25+ years was married to a woman for 15 years before we met. (When we met, he had already come out and had already separated from his wife.) He was able to divorce his wife on amicable terms and remain friends with her--they are friends to this day. I have found that many formerly heterosexually married gay men are able to accomplish this. I just hold that out as a hope for you.