If you haven't been there in over 2 years, then how does the church even know what your "Lifestyle" has become? In that case, they are engaging in rumor and gossip, which we all know is sin. So you might point that out to them, perhaps in a letter. In that letter, you might include some refutations to the clobber passages that they are using in their "pat responses." For instance, any use of the Leviticus scriptures can be refuted by pointing out that many christians eat shrimp and lobster, or that nearly all christians wear fabric that is some kind of blend, both of which are forbidden by the Levitical laws. Conservative christians have a habit of picking and choosing which laws they wish to enforce. In this letter, you might ask them to remove you from their membership. You may have an emotional tie to the church, but they have already rejected you. Why fight to be a part of a group that doesn't want you, and refuses to listen to reason? Your membership in a church doesn't guarantee your entrance into heaven anymore than walking into a garage would make you a car.
Do you really need to keep this membership? Why would it be so awful to be removed?