I am so sorry to hear of the backlash and harsh judgment you have received from people who say they love you. In no way have they shown you Christ's love or acceptance, which by the way I might add is a commandment Christ himself gave us. I agree we don't have a lifestyle anymore than straight people have one. We live our lives like everyone else does. We just do it authentically and honestly, most of us who have come out. I suggest you go to Jamie McDaniel's website and look at his coming out letter and model yours after his, if you find it helpful. Then get away from that harmful church. Find a good MCC or UCC church to go and enjoy fellowship with others like yourself. You will find acceptance and love and the most important of anything is GRACE. That is one thing I find most churches these days sorely lacking and the one thing that Jesus dispensed for us on the cross. The church that is going to excommunicate you apparently only pays lip service to grace and doesn't practice it. Most people who spew out hatred of gays and lesbians don't practice the concept of grace. I urge you to as much as you can practice forgiveness and love these people despite their blatant rejection of you. Don't give into the divisive spirit that has grabbed hold of their hearts. Jesus intends for us to be like-minded and the divisiveness with which these churches operate is straight from hell itself. That is not what Jesus is all about and certainly He does not receive glory from the rejection you have experienced at the hands of these people. At any rate, I hope that someday you find the strength to come out to your father and I hope that you can live an authentic gay Christian life. Bless you.