I know nothing, no church or person, is perfect... but I'm not sure whether I believe that IHOP can be as fantastic as you claim if it still harbours hatred of homosexuals.
Either way, that's rather beside the point.
abfaboy, there's excellent advice in this thread - and I'll add to it that one of the most important things you can do is make sure that he knows he can talk to you; so that he will, at some point, look to you for an escape from what he's experiencing - because you can give it to him.
You're both in my prayers *hug*
For now there are faith, hope, and love; and of these three, the greatest is love. (1Cor 13:13)