How the forum has changed me
I was raised in the South where men don't cry. I was taught that shedding tears is a sign of weakness and that only girls cry. So all my life I've had a very hard time expressing emotions of sadness. If there was ever a situation that made my eyes tear up, I'd quickly try to think of something else to take my mind off the situation.
Last January I went by myself to see Brokeback Mountain. At the end of the movie, no matter how much I tried, I couldn't stop the tears. Thank God the theater was dark and I was sitting by myself away from others. As people were leaving I stayed behind so that nobody would see my red eyes. Finally I got up and left the theater with my head down as I made my way to the car and home. I would have been very embarrassed if anybody had seen me leaving the theater like that.
Then, last Friday night, my cat Randall was hit by a car and killed. I picked him up off the street and carried him to the house in my arms and laid him down on the porch. I went inside and fell onto my bed and cried for half an hour. After eight years of his unconditional love he's suddenly gone forever.
So what did I do after I finally got up and dried my face? I came onto this forum and told you guys about it. I barely know y'all. But from what little I did know, I knew I'd get the words of comfort that I needed. And I did.
And now I'm telling y'all how much I've cried from losing a pet.
So finally I have comfort in knowing that I got a place to come and tell y'all stuff like this without fear of hearing, "Damn man, get a grip. He was only a cat!"
And that's how this forum has changed me.