Quote:
Originally Posted by Emproph
Oh I’ve missed him so. I carried him around until his arm fell off. My mother sewed it back on but he was never the same. I still loved him, but apparently he was a few stitches more raggedy than he wanted to be.
He later absconded with Ann, or at least that’s what I was told…
But now he’s back, oh joy! |
That's because my arm was on backwards - BACKWARDS, can you imagine. You try taking care of - well, private things, with your hand the wrong way. My God, it's like I didn't know myself. I'd never been backwards before. But then - oh, the shame of it all.
And Ann, let me tell you about her. She is constantly pregnant with huge litters. I don't care that her pet name for me is "beanie", none of those little things look like me. Well, there was the one - cutest little thing, of course. We called him Schmaltz - Raggedy Schmaltz, such a nice name. Such a nice boy! Didn't eat near enough, though. Hell, he ate like a bird - skinny as a rail, he was. I always wanted a nicer name - Andy is so damn cheesy. I want to be called Arsenocoiteyn Malakoi from now on. You can call me Arse for short...
...what dear. Oh, yes, my meds. Coming pet. What? Another litter? Seventeen! Any of them look like me - we sold the last one. No, I suppose you can never tell with my gene pool - remind me to chlorinate it again, will you.
Ooooh! Gotta go, she sounds frisky.