Tit for tat
Why not invite your mother to a gay Pride event remnding her that she owes you?
We teach people how to treat us
The tough part is that I'm Sure Puerto Rican mothers are like Italian and Jewish mothers. If they ask a question and don't like the answer, they just ask the same question again until they get the answer they want.
(BTW Italian mothers invented this but Jewish mothers perfected it! I discovered this in medical practice and point it out when one of my patient pull this one when they don't like my answers!)
But seriously I agree with Keltic.. Draw the Line!
First write a letter Telling how badly she hurt your feelings when she did what she did to you (Guilt is a Jewish mothers emotional bread and butter!)
Next Tell her that you were surprised at how much she disliked the real you and that it is makes you sad and lonely to be turned away by some one who used to love you. Tell her how lonely you both will be from now on that her love for you is sacrificed for her fear of losing her church "friends".
But also tell her that when she can let go of her predjudice that she is still in your heart and can come back into your life. Until that time however she must do "time-out" as it were. This is How "Nanny" get childish beings to behave.
BTW time is on your side not hers and believe me she knows it! I pointed this out to my homophobic father and let him chew on it a few months before I was ready to resume communication.
Here you teach in a firm but loving way, making it clear that you are an adult and will respond in such a way. Like a nanny you may need to endure childish screaming and protest. Reaffirm that "time-out" doesn't end until she behaves properly.
Love and affirmation,
Forrester Tongpa Nyi (formerly Ash Phoenix, faeries evolve! )
When you come to know that your entitlement to joy is a given, All that remains is the exploration of the many different ways to let it in
Last edited by scott snedeker; 03-21-2009 at 09:18 AM.
Reason: brain mites