With all the anti-gay rhetoric and hatred being spewed about, I think it would be difficult not to have violent feelings towards the murderers of Matthew Shepard. I struggle with the same thing day in, day out, seeing what the right wing is allowed to get away with in our country. We are just about the last minority that is considered OK to slander, harass, harm, and/or kill.
However, (I don't know if this helps, but I hope it will) you are better than all those people. They are ignorant and cruel, seeking only to tear down, not to build. I would suggest that if you can, get active in some way...I intend to find ways of being more active in our struggle. They know only hate and negativity. Let's not fall into that trap.
I just keep asking the Lord and Lady to help me not translate anger to violence. It helps that I really couldn't do much physical harm to anyone, but still...