Originally Posted by scott snedeker
I'm confident that the largest fraction of people suffering from violence of homophbia have same gender sexxxxual attraction to the same gender and are fearful of discovery and abandonement to the point of terror, anger hatred of self and those who reflect what they hate in themselves.
I was one of those and still have trouble forgiving myself for what I said at age forteen to another guy in Gym class who was flirting with me
This makes a hell (and it is hell, isn't it?) of a lot of sense! My own fear led me to shut down all awareness of attraction to other men for over a decade. It came busting out when I was 28. Does that kind of self-oppression take its toll? Yep. It sure does. You don't get out of that kind of thing overnight. It took years. And hello! This affects relationships!
So- whether one acts out against one's self or another- I- like you- recognize and believe (and isn't that what Soulforce is all about?) that compassion is the only answer. Nothing less than that will do.
Take heart Scotty. You've more than made up for past actions.