[E.B.G.]

My name is Eric Benjamin Gordon. I'm a Jew-turned-Chrsitian from Upstate NY. I've known I'm homosexual since I was a month shy of eighteen. At first, it was just another part of me that was different (in addition to being legally blind, a hippie and a classic rock musician). I still had a lot to learn about just how fearful and prejudiced some people can be. That was near the end of 1997. Within a year-and-a-half, my whole world would change.

When I was nineteen, I met my first "boyfriend." He taught me a lot about life and love, but it wasn't a real relationship. We were platonic and exclusive. Then at age twenty-two, I became a Christian. Our gay friends warned me about modern right wingers who accuse homosexuality of being a sin. At the time, I was between college semesters; when I went back to school, what happened? I joined a fellowship and fell right in with them. Between that and the lack of real intimacy, I went in the closet as of October 2002 and started denying myself (to myself).

It took over three years, two band break-ups, witnessing two family divorces, several failed courses and the end of my own psudo-relationship before I could come to grips with being a gay Christian. When I left for Indianapolis on a three-year stay, I decided to embrace both my spiritual side and my sexual orientation. I've pondered making contributions to Soulforce as a bid to try and bring confidence to questioning homosexuals (or those in denial) and to add my voice to the push against homophobia. Homophobics are what I call "psychologically blind" and suffer from what I call "brick wall sndrome." Any opportunity to chip away at the wall is one worth seizing.

Eric.