You needed time away. I am not anti Christ, in fact i believe Christ to be a rare human genious like Buddha.
Just like a female rape victim may be unable to trust any man at first, She later can again love a man who loves her onece the wounds have healed....and you don't have to give up your coven to attend church. You can multifacet your spirituality. Choose what is true to your heart. You may even practice some Buddhist tradition one day
Love and affirmation,
Forrester Tongpa Nyi (formerly Ash Phoenix, faeries evolve! )
When you come to know that your entitlement to joy is a given, All that remains is the exploration of the many different ways to let it in