I have a memory, from when I was around 10, watching a Star Trek Cartoon, where they beamed down to a planet where the civilization was gone, but had made one last attempt to save itself, by making a machine the turned All but One person into Females, and it turned the entire crew into Females, except the most Masculinity Dominant one, Spock =)
And that was the first Real Way I could Express, but only to myself at the time, ~how I felt about me~ ~what I wanted, for my life~, if only it were possible ~sighs~ ...
Since, at the time, I didn't think it was... I chose to be "Spocky"... a nerd who never stopped learning, reading, trying to understand everything I possibly could, about anything and everything I could get my hands on.
Over and Over through the years, I've found ~so many~ different ways of saying, and expressing, that "I'm supposed to be Female!" ... but was always so afraid of being hurt... ~worse~... than I already had been... that I was too afraid to voice it... until I started seeing the therapist I've been seeing for almost 2 years now.
So I've been thinking of sharing more of what I've learned ~for myself~ with forums posts... because I seem to always find ~more~ to learn and understand, when others add ~their~ responses and perspectives regarding things I have to say, even when it's simply in response to what Others say, like in Your thread, Gennee ~hugz~(if ok =)
Thank you for sharing =)