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What do I do with all the things she ever said to me? Count them as lies and realize she didn't mean a damn thing she ever said? She was the only person to ever tell me that my skinny legs were beautiful. She was the only person who ever said to me, "You look good enough to eat!", and take me the way she did, and love me so passionately. Was all that lie? Was all that just BS?
It is hard for me to distinguish lies from the truth when I thought all along they were the truth. Did her truth change?
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Many of those things she said were true. Her purpose for telling you those things was the lie. She said those things to manipulate your feelings. I know it's a hard thing to accept that the one person you thought you could trust was just telling you what you wanted to hear. I'm sorry that you have had to go through all of that.
As for being on your own: I can tell you that it's better than being in a toxic relationship. You may get lonely but there are things you can do to be less lonely. The important thing is to not sit around and just think about things. That road only leads to deeper depression. Find a group that has the same hobby or interests that you do. It really helps to get dressed up and be around other people.