well, as i suspected by the stbx's response in the therapy session, we've hit a road bump. i mentioned the overnight idea to my 7yo on monday, then sent an email to the stbx on tuesday and offered some dates. i didn't tell my son when i planned on doing the sleepover, just that we would do it soon. the stbx called last night to berate me because the 7yo knew first, and i emailed the next day. so i asked if that meant she wasn't going to let me have him, and she said 'no'. so i asked what the problem was then. it broke into a heated argument and i said some things that my older kids will prolly pay for.
today i decided to call that therapist (my insurance is paying for it, so i figure she can speak with me privately too) I am asking her to see me privately so i can express my concerns about the motivations for the stbx to bring me into the therapy sessions. and also to voice my thoughts on why some things were said, and how it looks like the stbx isn't going to follow through.