Must we choose?

[squirt07]

I sit here in turmoil. I am gay or I have identified myself as such, at most it is one of my identities. Yet, I talked to a dear friend and become confused. It's like I want to love and obey God. Yet I'm still gay and based on the theology of my upbringing, I cannot be or do both. A seemingly wise friend says that being gay, drinking excessive alcohol, and cursing are viewed as sin. We cannot be of Christ and participate in these "appetites". I didn't think being gay is an appetite. And if it is, then I guess I should be celibate as well. Does this conclusion cause me any happiness or joy? No. I want to be married someday, whether legally or just ceremonially. I want to have a family with my wife. I want to live life and enjoy each other's company. I want all the things a heterosexual person would want. Do I really have to choose between you and my sexuality? Has it come down to this? Will this be the deal breaker of our friendship? If I can't be a Christian and be gay, which is more important? If I have to choose, which do I choose?