Which one are you?

[Rick336]

I never thought of myself as an introvert, but by the definition below, I think that maybe I am. I have no problem being alone and many times actually prefer it.

When I was younger, I think I probably fit the definition of an extrovert. I used to love to party and socialize. But as the years passed, I think I began to enjoy solitude. Even though I still enjoy being around people, small talk tends to bore me after only a few minutes. If somebody tells me a long detailed story about their afternoon at work, many times my mind will drift. If, on the other hand, they tell me why they think Barack Obama is a good or bad president, I can easily stay focused to what they're saying.

But mostly I think I'm an introvert because the definition below says, "Introverts are more concerned with the inner world of the mind. They enjoy thinking, exploring their thoughts and feelings." That's definitely me.

Here are some definitions of Introverts and Extroverts that I found on the web.

Definition of Introvert: Contrary to what most people think, an introvert is not simply a person who is shy. In fact, being shy has little to do with being an introvert! Shyness has an element of apprehension, nervousness and anxiety, and while an introvert may also be shy, introversion itself is not shyness. Basically, an introvert is a person who is energized by being alone and whose energy is drained by being around other people.

Introverts are more concerned with the inner world of the mind. They enjoy thinking, exploring their thoughts and feelings. They often avoid social situations because being around people drains their energy. This is true even if they have good social skills. After being with people for any length of time, such as at a party, they need time alone to "recharge."

When introverts want to be alone, it is not, by itself, a sign of depression. It means that they either need to regain their energy from being around people or that they simply want the time to be with their own thoughts. Being with people, even people they like and are comfortable with, can prevent them from their desire to be quietly introspective.

Being introspective, though, does not mean that an introvert never has conversations. However, those conversations are generally about ideas and concepts, not about what they consider the trivial matters of social small talk.



Definition of Extrovert: Most people believe that an extrovert is a person who is friendly and outgoing. While that may be true, that is not the true meaning of extroversion. Basically, an extrovert is a person who is energized by being around other people. This is the opposite of an introvert who is energized by being alone.

Extroverts tend to "fade" when alone and can easily become bored without other people around. When given the chance, an extrovert will talk with someone else rather than sit alone and think. In fact, extroverts tend to think as they speak, unlike introverts who are far more likely to think before they speak. Extroverts often think best when they are talking. Concepts just don't seem real to them unless they can talk about them; reflecting on them isn't enough.

Extroverts enjoy social situations and even seek them out since they enjoy being around people. Their ability to make small talk makes them appear to be more socially adept than introverts (although introverts may have little difficulty talking to people they don't know if they can talk about concepts or issues).

Extrovert behavior seems to be the standard in American society, which means that other behavior is judged against the ways an extrovert would behave. However, extroverted behavior is simply a manifestation of the way an extrovert interacts with the world.


Rick

[andrewlittle]

While I am not shy, I am usually reserved and I do find social gatherings exhausting. I recharge by withdrawing into my head.

Of course, these could also just be signs that I am wacko.

[u-dog]

I am fairly gregarious and out-going. Not shy in the least. But I am an introvert. Polly and I took the Myers-Briggs personality type indicator at a marriage enrichment workshop shortly after we were married. She was shocked to discover that I was an Introvert (pretty far over on the spectrum too!) She accused me of false advertising. I didn't really know it either until they shared the above definitions with me and it made total sense to me.

Andy. It's not an either/or thing. Its possible to be BOTH an Introvert AND a whacko.

[nmwolfboy]

i'm definitely an introvert by those definitions. Unfortunately there's rarely time to be alone - it's kinda like my Holy Grail. i also love silence and the craving for that is very similar to my craving for solitude.

scott

[scott snedeker]

Ok so how about a solicitous introvert ( like to talk ith other people about what's in my head) Sometimes I think I want to share my inner accomplishment to reinforce the lesson I have learned. Sometimes I see the same suffering in someone else and want to help shim find a way to let go too. Sometimes I have such a sense of inadequacy about a personal issue that when I overcome it I want to show off!

[tymejumper]

Originally Posted by u-dog

I am fairly gregarious and out-going. Not shy in the least. But I am an introvert. Polly and I took the Myers-Briggs personality type indicator at a marriage enrichment workshop shortly after we were married. She was shocked to discover that I was an Introvert (pretty far over on the spectrum too!) She accused me of false advertising. I didn't really know it either until they shared the above definitions with me and it made total sense to me.

Andy. It's not an either/or thing. Its possible to be BOTH an Introvert AND a whacko.

Are you an INFJ? That is what I am and I am one of the few personality types that get confused for an extrovert! I oldest is one also.

[tymejumper]

We have a weird set up at my house. Usually there are not many introverts, extroverts are the norm in society at large with intros being rarer.

We are all introverts except for my youngest, she is extroverted. We all want to sit around in the house or in our backyard and just be with each other and have maybe one person or two people over. She's like "I have not played with anyone today" when she just came home from school. I told her to invite friends for her birthday party and she came to me with a list of 32 people. My other two had maybe a total of 5 people each to invite. So, we tell her to go and suck up her energy from others and come home later. She is so much more calm and relaxed when she comes back.

And the upside, I know everyone in the neighborhood because she never meets a stranger.

[u-dog]

Originally Posted by tymejumper

Are you an INFJ? That is what I am and I am one of the few personality types that get confused for an extrovert! I oldest is one also.

INTP the last time I took the Meiers Briggs. I was an INTJ when I was younger but I moved. My "T" has also moved much closer to the center line as I've aged. The the "I" never changes though... its always way over to the edge.

[Gennee]

I'm an introvert. I enjoy people and people enjoy being around me but I prefer being by myself. I like the path less traveled, particularly when I'm on vacation.

People are surprised when I can discuss social and political issues because I'm quiet and reserved.

Gennee

[BruceChris]

A woman that I met recently asked me what I do on a Saturday night. I said that I curl up with a good book on Quantum Mechanics. She gave me a funny look. Maybe you Can be an introvert, And a bit of a wacko.

Get on Gettin' on, Bruce Chris

[Jennifer5]

By these definitions I am definitely an extrovert. I am energized by being around other people. I like time to myself too, but I don't need much of it.

INTJ and INFJ, what are those?

Also, more about Myers Briggs... do all of their personality tests and whatnot cost?

[tdogg]

Is it possible to be both? I can define myself by both meanings, depending on circumstances and how I'm feeling. Sometimes people can be draining to me, but then sometimes they are energizing. Sometimes I am super energized alone and sometimes I drain myself.

Maybe neither, but simply wacko.

[andrewlittle]

I believe so far it is close to a tie between introverts and whackos.

I think the test for the latter is whether it drains you to be around the crowd in your head.

[u-dog]

Originally Posted by Jennifer5

By these definitions I am definitely an extrovert. I am energized by being around other people. I like time to myself too, but I don't need much of it.

INTJ and INFJ, what are those?

Also, more about Myers Briggs... do all of their personality tests and whatnot cost?

Jenn,

The Myers Briggs Personality Type indicator is an instrument which is used to help groups of people function more efficiently together by understanding each members "preferred style" of operating in the world. The results are reported on four spectrums. The first one is the spectrum between Introvert and Extrovert which we have been discussing here. The second is the spectrum between iNtuitive and Sensing which someone else will have to explain because I have never really gotten that one. The third is the spectrum between Thinking and Feeling. The fourth is the spectrum between Perceiving and Judging. This last has to do with whether you are the kind of person who is driven to come to a conclusion as soon as possible about an issue or action or the kind of person who can leave all of the pieces floating around loose while you discern how they fit together.

So, since there are two letters on each spectrum and four spectrum there are .... what? sixteen? possible combinations of which INTP and INFJ are two.

If you are involved in any organization or team for very long you will have the opportunity to take the Myers-Briggs and it won't cost you. There might even be someplace on the internet where you could take it. It doesn't take long to complete and there a lots of people out there who are trained to interpret the results. It's not the Bible or anything but I have found it to be helpful in explaining why I always am butting heads with certain people.

[Zerbie]

There are tons of online tests for Myers-Briggs, and they vary. I've taken many of them, and never been able to get an answer other than that I was an IENSTFPJ (that is, ALL types simultaneously) until I finally stumbled upon a test version that was good for me and gave me an actual answer.

That's hard to do, since for all the letters I WAS assigned, I was 49% the other letter-category as well, except for only one category where there was a substantial difference. Just Google Myers-Briggs and you will find some versions of the test to take, Jen.

[antiochian]

I actually took the Meyers-Briggs test in class when I was just beginning college. Results, INFP. I love being with friends and such, but have a rather solitary nature. It's hard to describe exactly what I mean by that. Social situations can be a nightmare, because I'm too caught up in what's going on in my head and find that social interaction is a lot harder for me than for others I know. It really depends on the people I'm with. Even as a teenager, I found my energy in books and alone time rather than in being around my peers.

[merlin2921]

Introvert. Hardcore. *nods* To the point of being a near-hermit, at times...

[tymejumper]

Originally Posted by BruceChris

A woman that I met recently asked me what I do on a Saturday night. I said that I curl up with a good book on Quantum Mechanics. She gave me a funny look. Maybe you Can be an introvert, And a bit of a wacko.

Get on Gettin' on, Bruce Chris

Sounds like my wife. Never but NEVER question the engineers judgement!


Actually, funny you mention Quantum mechanics. Just a few days ago, we had a family discussion about Quantum Theory and the Theory of Relativity.
I am glad we are not the only nerds out there.

[wmanion]

When I took the test several years ago I was INFP, however, I do think that these categories can be as fluid as one's sexuality. There are times I can be extroverted, all though those times are rare.

Bill

[u-dog]

Polly went to a womens retreat several years ago at which one of the participants kept referring to her "P-ness" as being the source of many her difficulties in groups. All the rest of the women had to keep staring at the floor, chewing on their tongues and pinching themselves to keep from laughing out loud.