Greetings from Canada

[Lydia]

I'm Lydia. 22 years old.

And I have no idea what to say next.

[Zerbie]

Hi Lydia, welcome to the forums! People are generally very supportive and caring around here. Share as much or as little as you like. Blabbermouths like me will type something almost every day.

[Jamie McDaniel]

Hi Lydia! Welcome to Soulforce. Do you have any thoughts about Canada's recent election of conservatives and the new prime-minister, Stephen Harper? Any insight into what effect that might have on the GLBT rights movement in your country?

[Vanessa White]

Lydia: Great to have you here. Welcome, and enjoy your time in the forums. THere is a ton of support here, and we talk about a variety of topics, whatever occurs to us on any given day. Say a little or a lot. Like Zerbie, I am here almost daily and the exchanges are awesome. Peace, Vanessa

[Emproph]

Welcome Lydia.

I have to say I enjoyed your simple yet poetic juxtaposition of honesty and irony, greetingwise speakingly of course.

[Jennifer5]

Welcome!

[Lydia]

Originally Posted by Jamie McDaniel

Hi Lydia! Welcome to Soulforce. Do you have any thoughts about Canada's recent election of conservatives and the new prime-minister, Stephen Harper? Any insight into what effect that might have on the GLBT rights movement in your country?

Well, he doesn't scare me as much as George Bush does. I was actually born in the States, and moved to Canada to get married just last year.

[Lydia]

Originally Posted by Emproph

Welcome Lydia.

I have to say I enjoyed your simple yet poetic juxtaposition of honesty and irony, greetingwise speakingly of course.

Thanks. I'm a poet by nature.

[sam]

Hi! That's great that you're married! What's your story if you don't mind me asking. I struggle a lot with justifying being a lesbian with being a Christian (mainly because I was raised in a super conservative Christian household), so it's always encouraging to hear other people's stories.

samantha

[Lydia]

Originally Posted by sam

Hi! That's great that you're married! What's your story if you don't mind me asking. I struggle a lot with justifying being a lesbian with being a Christian (mainly because I was raised in a super conservative Christian household), so it's always encouraging to hear other people's stories. samantha

Not sure if this is the right place to tell my story. Feel free to move, edit or delete this post if necessary, moderators. I'm still not sure about all of the rules her. My story:

I grew up as a preacher's kid. Oldest of three children, only daughter. My parents were pretty conservative when I was small, and we lived in a series of small, conservative communities. I was homeschooled until Grade 4. We didn't have a TV for quite a few of those years, and even when we did have a tv the programming we could watch was restricted. I'm probably making my childhood sound much harsher than it actually was - my parents were good to me overall, and we're close now. I just didn't have any LGBT-ish role models while growing up.

I was about 12 when I developed my first crush on a girl. I knew what my church said about it ("it's a sin"), so I did nothing. I'm sure it helped that I liked (and like) boys as well. But there was always that...not fear exactly, but worry (?) that I'd give myself away. That I'd be found out.

So I kept quiet. I didn't date girls, but I barely dated boys either. I concentrated on school and ended up getting a series of scholarships and a work-study job that helped me earn my BS with very little debt.

I met my husband about 2 1/2 years ago on another message board I post at, www.theooze.com. I didn't tell him about my orientation until we were engaged, and I didn't tell my parents until last summer. It's still something I keep quiet to most people, not out of shame but because of the really horrible things I've heard other christians say about those of us on the LBGT.

Of course, there's also the fact that I've never been in a relationship with another woman. It wasn't out of a lack of interest, things just didn't work out. Some of my crushes were straight, others were in relationships at the time. So I have the orientation but not the experience, which I why I'm mostly listening at this point.

*Edited for poor grammar*

[BruceChris]

Greetings and God's love, Lydia

I would hope that it would come thru to everyone that the mesage of the Bible is that God loves us, and not that we should spend all of our time reading the book of Leviticus.

So what did you get your degree in? Tell us about your sweetie. What are you doing currently? Have you found a supportive LGBT community up
there? A church that works for you? You are young, healthy I assume, and you must have some plans for the future!

Peace and Love, Bruce

No "Special Rights" for Hetrosexuals!

[Lydia]

Thanks for your interest, BruceChris.

Originally Posted by BruceChris

Greetings and God's love, Lydia

I would hope that it would come thru to everyone that the mesage of the Bible is that God loves us, and not that we should spend all of our time reading the book of Leviticus. BruceChris

Oh, of course. If I thought differently I probably wouldn't be a christian anymore.

I majored in Psychology. Not exactly sure what I'll do with that degree at this point, although I am thinking about going to grad school in several years once my students loans are paid off.

My sweetie's name is Drew. He's 28 and works in Tech Support, a job he's grown tired of over the last year or so. I'm still the process of immigrating to Canada and probably won't be (legally...my health is excellent) able to work until the end of this year. So Drew's stuck with his position for now - we have to pay the rent somehow!

So I'm currently a "housewife" in that I'm home all day while he works. I'm slowly beginning to volunteer a few different places, so that fills up some time. I also write and have just started getting into photography.

Toronto is actually a pretty wondeful place to live if you're part of the LGBT community. There's a large church up here (can't remember it's name, but I'll look it up if anyone's interested) that gears itself specifically to people like us. I haven't visited it yet, but I've heard very good things about it. Gay marriage has been legal for years in most of the provinces, and just last summer Canada finally passed a bill that made it legal nationwide.

The church I attend doesn't *officially* condone same-sex relationships, etc, but I've met at least one LGBT-er there who seems to have found a balance in the sense that she seems pretty happy. I'm not sure if she's partnered, or if the "balance" I sense is more of a celibacy sort of thing. I don't know her well enough to ask.

It's a great community otherwise, very friendly and strongly rooted in social justice and pacifism

My orientation hasn't come up in conversation yet, but I plan to be honest if/when anyone asks.

*Edited to fix bad grammar. *

[Zerbie]

Hey Lydia! I'm so glad you posted that story - I feel less alone here now, being married (to a guy I mean!).



I had revolving sexual orientations most of my young life until I finally figured out that being bisexual means my sexuality doesn't have a static orientation. I would identify alternately with the gay community or as a straight ally. When I finally came out as BI everything else fell into place and there was such a peace, such a comfort level with myself in regards to "orientation" I would never identify any other way again. Except as not having an orientation (y'know, the "I don't use labels" thing - that's me.)

My hubby and I have been married for almost 3 years!!! Coming out to him wasn't hard at all. When we started discussing marriage I said to him, "You know, now that we're discussing marriage, I just want to make sure you know that I'm bisexual and really identify with the gay community. Would it make you uncomfortable to marry a queer girl?" And he was like, "Oh, that's NEWS?? I seem to remember competing all summer long with (girl's name) for dates with you."

And that was that. Easiest "coming out" ever - he was like, Duh, it's obvious that you're bi!

But just in case anyone is questioning it: we're monogamous. Lots of times people think when I tell them this that it means I date girls on the side or something. Uh, nope.

Anyway, that was a long digression wasn't it? Lydia - I'm glad you shared your story. I relate to some parts of it.

[Lydia]

Originally Posted by Zerbie

Hey Lydia! I'm so glad you posted that story - I feel less alone here now, being married (to a guy I mean!)..

You're welcome.

When I finally came out as BI everything else fell into place and there was such a peace, such a comfort level with myself in regards to "orientation" I would never identify any other way again. Except as not having an orientation (y'know, the "I don't use labels" thing - that's me.)

I'd say the same thing about myself.

Easiest "coming out" ever - he was like, Duh, it's obvious that you're bi!

That's exactly what my guy said to me.

[Zerbie]

Oh Lydia, how funny is that?!

Your guy sounds terrific too! I'm happy for you (and for me) - Yayyyyy!!!!

[Hearts&Minds]

Originally Posted by Lydia

I'm Lydia. 22 years old.

And I have no idea what to say next.

Hi! I haven't interested myself here yet, but I wanted to say hello since we've got a few things in common!

I'm a 24-yr old bisexual woman who grew up in Canada (Fredericton, Windsor) and went to university in Toronto. I graduated a couple years ago with a bachelor of journalism and am living in 'Nam figuring out what to do with my life next!

Toronto's LBGT scene is fantastic... I had a blast the 4 years I lived there (though I refused to live on Church street). The great thing about Toronto is that there are numerous gay districts and neighbourhoods. I live in Vietnam with my best friend, male, but the woman I love is back home in Toronto.

I hope you find what you're looking for, congrats on the marriage!

[Lydia]

Thanks for the warm welcome, Hearts&Minds.

And yes, Toronto is a great place to live.