Ex-Gay Survivor Conference

[Peterson]

Just wondering who is coming to the Ex-Gay Survivor Conference in Irvine, CA June 29-July 1, 2007. The conference is co-sponsored by Soulforce, the LGBT Resource Center and Beyond Ex-Gay.

I am so glad that Soulforce approached me and Christine Bakke some months ago to see about doing something to address the ex-gay movement. This conference will be great for ex-gay survivors but also for concerned allies--LGBT and straight--who want to know more, stand with survivors as we tell our stories and to learn how to do more effective activism.

Soooo, who is coming???

To find out more visit BeyondExGay or of course Soulforce

[Zerbie]

Welcome Peterson!

Thanks for joining! I can't attend the conference (we'll be on vacation elsewhere) but I'm glad it is happening. The entire idea that people should attempt to change their affectional orientation is anathema to me.

Hey, let us non-attendees know of any way that we can help, too, okay?

Wishes for a successful event,

Zerbie

[Emproph]

Hopefully I'll make it.

[Emproph]

I just ran across this at the God & Gays blogsite, part of the film forum at the conference. http://www.godandgaysthemovie.com/


Ex-gay Boston Legal

[ladyinred]

I'd personally would like to know what the numbers will be that show up, this should be enlightening.

Hey Peterson I just wanted to post this from the HRC websiteI'd done so in the past months ago, for people who have any doubts about how ineffective exgay ministries have been.http://www.hrc.org/Template.cfm?Sect...entDisplay.cfm , " Finally free". Hopefully this will help some of the posters on Soulforces forum who can get a good look at what they are doing in the exgay ministries and the damage it has done..

[ladyinred]

This is the foward by Wayne Besen:

When I was in middle school, there was a kid named
David who wanted more than anything in the world to
please his father and make the school’s basketball team.
The problem was, he was too short. When another summer
passed and other students grew while he still hadn’t,
he became disconsolate. One day, a new physical education
coach told him that he could grow taller if he would
simply hang from a chin-up bar and stretch himself for
an hour each afternoon. David religiously followed the
coach’s advice and could be seen after school suspended
from a metal bar in the schoolyard.
After a month of dangling, David had convinced
himself that he had grown. To the amusement of many
students, he galloped around
the school and boasted that
he was now tall enough to
make the basketball team.
Unfortunately, while the
mind can play deceptive
tricks, reality can be cruel
and unforgiving. David, as
short as ever, was humiliated
at basketball tryouts and was
cut on the first day by the
very coach who told him to
hang from the bar. Before he
sent David home, the coach told the devastated young
man that he had failed to grow because he had not tried
hard enough.
Much like this misguided coach, “reparative” therapists
and the “ex-gay” ministries offer false “hope” and
magic “cures” for desperate people, then turn around
and cruelly blame these folks when their bizarre “treatments”
fail.
The essays in “Finally Free: How Love & Self-
Acceptance Saved Us from ‘Ex-Gay’ Ministries” are more
than just stories about brave gay and lesbian Americans
overcoming life’s obstacles and challenges. These are stories
that any person can relate to who has tried in vain to
live up to the unrealistic expectations of peers or family
members. Anyone who has chased affection by trying to
be who or what he or she is not can understand why
some people feel compelled to try changing their sexual
orientation through the “ex-gay” ministries or “reparative”
therapy. The fear of rejection and the desire to be loved
and accepted is universal. Nearly all people want to make
friends and family members proud — sometimes embracing
desperate measures to do so.
“Finally Free” hopes to set the record straight on the
astronomical, if not complete, failure rate of the “ex-gay”
ministries and “reparative therapy.” In their own words,
ex-ex-gays vividly describe their harrowing experiences
and reveal the painful, broken promises of these kinds of
“change” groups.
All the following stories are true. They are about real
people across America who gave up years of their lives
and suffered through grave psychological trauma because
they bought the lie that being gay made them defective
and less than whole human beings. A common thread in
each essay in “Finally Free” is how desperately these individuals
tried to conform and reject their sexual orientation.
Methods of change included all-night prayer sessions,
exorcisms, fasting, lipstick application seminars for
lesbians and endless, expensive sessions with so-called
“reparative” therapists.
Somehow, in the midst of overwhelming personal
turmoil and stifling social pressures, these courageous
individuals learned how to love and accept themselves for
who they are – not who the Christian Coalition’s Pat
Robertson and others told them they should be. More
remarkable, by “coming out” they finally discovered the
close, personal relationships with God that they had originally
sought through the “ex-gay” ministries.
The journeys undertaken by these people are a testament
to the strength and resilience of the human spirit.
They offer hope to “ex-gays” still trapped in a lifestyle
where they are demeaned and dehumanized because of
who they are. The essays in “Finally Free” should be read
by anyone who has questions about the efficacy of the
“ex-gay” ministries and “reparative” therapy.
Unholy Alliance
These moving stories must also be told because the
conservative right has recently embraced “ex-gay” ministries
and “reparative” therapy as a tactic to undermine
gay and lesbian equality. Their message: “Since gays and
lesbians can change, there is no need for laws that protect
them from discrimination.”
This unholy alliance between the conservative right
and “ex-gay” groups is a fairly new phenomenon. For
more than two decades, the “ex-gay” ministries acted in
relative obscurity. Both gay activists and the religious right
saw these ministries as ineffective and not worthy of attention.
Similarly, “reparative therapy,” which seeks to change
homosexuals into heterosexuals, was — and still is —
rejected by nearly all respected, credible medical and mental
health experts. For years, the vast majority of social
conservatives were also skeptical, if not overtly hostile, to
the dubious claims of “reparative” therapists and their
reliance on secular methods to “cure” homosexuality

[ladyinred]

I sure hope awe idiot and Hobo see this. I know they are having a rough time.

[Jamie McDaniel]

Well, I'll be there along with fellow Soulforce staff members/volunteers Mel White, Jeff Lutes, Kara Speltz, Paige Schiltz, and Bill Carpenter. Looks like 68 people have registered thus far on the Soulforce site. So attendance will hopefully be about 100+ for the conference.

[tpdncr4christ]

I am so there! It is right up the street from me! I wanna meet you guys! Ooo this is exciting, can I come? Info? What do I do and where do I sign?

[Emproph]

Originally Posted by tpdncr4christ

I am so there! It is right up the street from me! I wanna meet you guys! Ooo this is exciting, can I come? Info? What do I do and where do I sign?

You're probably aware of this by now, but for anyone else who may be just around the corner (or willing to make last minute plans), the info is right on the Soulforce home page. Details here:
http://www.soulforce.org/article/1226

[Emproph]

I pray that you pray the emotion of this

Oasis - All Around The World

Isn't that cool?!

Here's the lyrics.

[Emproph]

Ex-Gay Survivor Conference

Many of us (activists) meeting in person for the first time this weekend, it's empowering.

This photo turned out much better than I expected, it almost looks staged when I look at it now... -- of course I was in the "mess" of it when it happened -- I'm right above the "S" in "Survivor," half smiling with the sunglasses and cap on backwards.

It works as a thumbnail, the rest on the home page link are thumbnails too.

[Dash]

Originally Posted by Emproph

I pray that you pray the emotion of this

Oasis - All Around The World

Isn't that cool?!

Here's the lyrics.

Originally Posted by Emproph

Ex-Gay Survivor Conference

Many of us (activists) meeting in person for the first time this weekend, it's empowering.

This photo turned out much better than I expected, it almost looks staged when I look at it now... -- of course I was in the "mess" of it when it happened -- I'm right above the "S" in "Survivor," half smiling with the sunglasses and cap on backwards.

I love that video, Em... LOVE IT!!!

And you back there bein' too cool for school! Nifty! Looks like a happy collection of 'mos.

[Zerbie]

Are you the tall guy in the back row?

[Emproph]

Originally Posted by Dash

And you back there bein' too cool for school!

Was I that transparent? It was at a university and all, but I hadn't considered that I had a school issue going on. Why, do you think that my need to be cool is related to my issues with school? Or is it a need for school and issues with cool? (i'm going to leave it at there..)

Nifty! Looks like a happy collection of 'mos.

Apparently it all just kind of fell together. All those gay guys in the same vicinity and not arguing over the best lighting angle was a minor miracle in and of itself. And I remember hearing talk of how we wanted to go for the whole 'collection' look, obviously for stereotypical homoSexual agenda political purposes. So I'm pleased to know that it all worked out.. as planned

Originally Posted by Zerbie

Are you the tall guy in the back row?

I'm on the left hand side in the back, glasses and cap on. No biggie, it's mostly for disclosure. You guys really have to check out the rest of these photos. I think they convey a lot of the spirit of the conference today. It was definitely an Oasis.

And remember, this is in response to the "ex-gay" Exodus conference. Not a protest, but as it's been stated; "A thoughtful response.."

"El very much so" is all I can say in response to that statement.


Registration


Sharing Ex-Gay Experiences


Peterson leads the Chalk Talk

"Lot's" more pics here, "straight" from "Sodom"...

Be afraid of gays, they spread happiness.

[Zerbie]

[QUOTE=Emproph;33843]Was I that transparent? It was at a university and all, but I hadn't considered that I had a school issue going on. Why, do you think that my need to be cool is related to my issues with school? Or is it a need for school and issues with cool? (i'm going to leave it at there..)


I'm on the left hand side in the back, glasses and cap on.

Ah ha! I always *knew* you were a Cool Dude. Ha! I'm right!

And, what a cutie!!

[pnggrad79]

I never went through reparative therapy or ex-gay therapy. I put myself through hell for 12 years trying to "cure" myself of my same-sex attraction. I prayed, begged, pleaded to God to change me, take this evilness away from me and guide me to the "right" kind of attraction toward females. I stayed in an unhappy marriage, rationalizing my feelings and playing a part that wasn't me. Finally, one night in Albuquerque, New Mexico sitting in the parking lot of Sandia Peak Tram Station, overlooking Albuquerque, I came out to myself and decided to quit fighting. Once I got back to Texas, I was laying on the couch one night, praying and pleading with God one more time to cure me of my lesbianism. All of a sudden a peace came over me and I heard, "Stop fighting" I went up to my lover's room and crawled into bed with her and said, "I think I am in love with you and I guess that makes me a lesbian." She grabbed me and hugged me and said, "I'm in love with you, too and I guess I am a lesbian, too."

It took 3 more years of coming to terms with it, but I finally did and am happy to say that even though my family has excommunicated me, I have a wonderful wife and two beautiful daughters and life is good.

Ex-gay therapy is a desperate attempt by Big Religion to keep people under control.

[antonyh]

The Box Turtle Bulletin is featuring a Soulforce action at NARTH. You can see the YouTubes, etc. here:

http://www.boxturtlebulletin.com/2007/07/03/512

[Emproph]

Survivor's Initiative - NARTH Action - Part 1 of 2

Daniel Gonzales:

“And most tragic is the loss of my faith.

I grew up in a church. I grew up in an evangelical Baptist church. I was told you have to accept all of the Bible as it’s interpreted literally or none of it. And in order to move on and come out of the closet and get on with my life, I had to leave my faith behind.”

Darlene Bogle:

"...Declaring to the world that I was ex-gay, because I had no same sex attraction.

For the next 15 years I dedicated my life to helping others with a message of change being possible. I was the poster child for Exodus examples of those who had been delivered from their homosexual orientation. Only one thing was wrong, I had no attraction to men.

...My Christian therapist took that approach, yet years later I realized I was never accepted for who I was, and am. A woman who is a Christian, with a lesbian orientation."

Originally Posted by Daniel Gonzales

and most tragic is the loss of my faith.

If there is one line that expresses what I learned at the conference, that is it.

[Emproph]

Fri 22 - Sun 24, February 2008

Call to Artists!

We want to see your art! Deadline for submissions for the Ex-Gay Survivor Art Show if February 13. Click here for details!

Beyond Ex-Gay
Mid-South Regional Gathering
Memphis, TN

Organizers, presenters and attenders from the first Ex-Gay Survivor Conference will be present including Christine Bakke, Peterson Toscano, Jim Burroway, Daniel Gonzales, and Jacob Wilson.

bXg will offer a series of interactive workshops for ex-gay survivors and their allies.

Or you could just watch the video...