How long have you been here? ..and Why?

[Jennifer5]

These forums have existed for nearly 2 1/2 years... how long have you been here? Why?

[Zerbie]

I joined the day the forum was announced to the SF email listserve.

Whaddaya mean "why?!?!?" Because Jamie McDaniel promised a free book to the first 20 people to sign up.

Maybe if I keep on posting, he'll mail me another book.

[keltic63]

Originally Posted by Jennifer5

These forums have existed for nearly 2 1/2 years... how long have you been here? Why?

Zerbie and I have been here from just about the first day this place opened up to the public.

Why am I here? I love this place. I love these people.

In spite of the recent bickering, this is by far the friendliest place on the interweb thingie. I learn so much from these people; and there are times that I look at a post, read it, my eyes glaze over, and I think to myself "this person is so beyond where I am, I'm gonna have to digest this in little pieces." Today alone, scotty reminded me of something I need to keep in mind, emproph dissected the Sally Kern stuff in a way I never even dreamed, he even apologized to me for something that I didn't even detect as a slight, and Daniel is always reminding me to "be the change you seek." when I'm not sure about something, I call on quite a number of friends here in the forums. I only wish I could see them in person more often.

[keltic63]

Originally Posted by Zerbie

I joined the day the forum was announced to the SF email listserve.

Whaddaya mean "why?!?!?" Because Jamie McDaniel promised a free book to the first 20 people to sign up.

Maybe if I keep on posting, he'll mail me another book.

LOL, I got the book too!

[tpdncr4christ]

I'm here because my youth pastor said, hey Austin, check this place out! So I did. And I kept coming back... and then one day I disagreed with something Daniel said, so I joined to tell him, but essentially I got told. It's fun here, you can trust these folks for good advice... really.

[Jennifer5]

Originally Posted by Zerbie

I joined the day the forum was announced to the SF email listserve.

Whaddaya mean "why?!?!?" Because Jamie McDaniel promised a free book to the first 20 people to sign up.

Maybe if I keep on posting, he'll mail me another book.

Originally Posted by keltic63

LOL, I got the book too!

The funny thing is that I was at the library when I got that email... but I was REALLY tired and had to leave (not realizing that I had almost finished setting up my account)... so the email sit in my inbox for about a week (2?), then I finished signing up and wasn't very interested at first... there just wasn't that much to it in my opinion.

But I ended up asking Jamie where to get the book everyone was talking about (not realizing that he was the one who had them sent out to the first 20 people to sign up)... he ended up sending me the book so I could read it. As one who doesn't like books, I was shocked, because I acutally finished it!

[Jennifer5]

Originally Posted by tpdncr4christ

I'm here because my youth pastor said, hey Austin, check this place out! So I did. And I kept coming back... and then one day I disagreed with something Daniel said, so I joined to tell him, but essentially I got told. It's fun here, you can trust these folks for good advice... really.

I agree with that... and think it's really funny that you joined to tell Daniel off! We all seem to disagree with him at times... but really, we all just love him!

[Zerbie]

Originally Posted by keltic63

Zerbie and I have been here from just about the first day this place opened up to the public.

That's right! In fact - weren't you the first person to say "hi" to me on my "hello my name is" post??? I remember thinking that you were a big factor in keeping the socialization going from the very beginning. Thinking, that Keltic guy is such a People Person. You were so welcoming to everyone. Geez, what happened? ( Joking!! Joking!! )




Why am I here? I love this place. I love these people.

Me too, I love these people. They are family to me. Never thought I'd say that about a bunch of people I've never even met, but dammit, family they are.

In spite of the recent bickering, this is by far the friendliest place on the interweb thingie.
That is SO true! This is truly unusual for the kindly and respectful way we have found of being a community.


I learn so much from these people; and there are times that I look at a post, read it, my eyes glaze over, and I think to myself "this person is so beyond where I am, I'm gonna have to digest this in little pieces." Today alone, scotty reminded me of something I need to keep in mind, emproph dissected the Sally Kern stuff in a way I never even dreamed, he even apologized to me for something that I didn't even detect as a slight, and Daniel is always reminding me to "be the change you seek." when I'm not sure about something, I call on quite a number of friends here in the forums. I only wish I could see them in person more often.

Well Kelt: the last few months I have been watching your posts with delight as I have noticed the most tremendous blossoming of courage, strength, and incredible equanimity in you, and I have been thinking - Shit!! I'll NEVER be able to do what Keltic does!! How does he do it? *Will* I ever be like Keltic?

There is wisdom here among these souls. Every one has a great gift that they bring to this community. Jen is the soul of angel love and trust. Danny is a great teacher, strong protector, and the staunchest friend one could ever have. Tdogg is a fountain of positivity, hope, faith, anticipation and joy, and expresses herself with keen intellect and a highly discriminating mind. Paul has insights into the nature of the universe that just stop my breath. On and on it goes. We could write a book about how wonderful Soulforcers all are.

Originally Posted by keltic63

LOL, I got the book too!

C'mon Steve, admit it. It's the only reason you're here. You're really just hoping that if you post enough, you'll get another book.

[keltic63]

Originally Posted by Zerbie

C'mon Steve, admit it. It's the only reason you're here. You're really just hoping that if you post enough, you'll get another book.

actually, I'm secretly cataloging all the posts and editing them for publication in a reality based fantasy/sci-fi autobiography reference book.

[Zerbie]

Originally Posted by keltic63

actually, I'm secretly cataloging all the posts and editing them for publication in a reality based fantasy/sci-fi autobiography reference book.

Snrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt!!!!!!!!!!!!

Who would ever subject themselves to reading that??? OMG, imagine how long that would be?!?!?!?!?!

[andrewlittle]

I lived in a tiny community in deep rural Iowa, where Jenna was pastoring a church. I looked around and all I saw was people who looked like me, and I was forlorn. Jenna gave a sermon about inclusion - the one that led to her being run out of Iowa on a rail - and following that a man who had been a member of that church all his life came to her privately and said, "God bless you! This is the first time I have really felt like I belong in my own church." You don't have to guess why - he was gay.

I couldn't find a church in that area - there weren't many Presbyterian churches and no ministers died or got kicked out - and no-one wanted to hire the "minister's husband" to work for them, so I was long-term unemployed and unemployable. Out of the need to be around people who were more open and less parochial, Jenna and I attended a LGBT conference in Iowa City. We heard Mel White speak, and got to meet and talk with him. I learned aboiut Soulforce.

I came - I joined - I posted. I found my lifeline into the real and loving church I believe Jesus intended. This has been my primary church ever since. At the time, this place gave me a place of respite from an all-white, all-straight, male dominated little world. It saved my life. Now, it feeds my life abundantly. It is my family - and is far more functional, even in its contentious times - than my family of origin.

So I'm here, and here I intend to stay. You poor bast--ds.

[BenL]

A lot of paths intersected in that month. I had been walking a difficult but rewarding path with my spouse, who is trans. It had included the loss of our children. (One has reestablished contact, the other still hasn't after three years.) I had always been honest with my spouse about the fact that I am gay, but had never been out publicly. My therapist suggested that perhaps I would benefit from associating with other GLBT people who had the kind of spiritual goals that I do.

And then I got an email from a friend suggesting that I take a look at the Soulforce forums. I joined immediately. Funny thing is that the friend never did. He doesn't do internet discussion groups.

I had participated in several listservs and discussion boards, mostly about mixed orientation marriages, which is what I thought I was in until my husband came out as trans. This one, by far, is the most civil I have ever belonged to. I have experienced flame wars that singed what little hair I have left.

I have never belonged anywhere comfortably. I am a gay man who thought he was married to a woman. The gay male community told me to divorce and become authentic. Now I'm a gay man married to a transman. Oh, get real. How can you settle for less than the total package? I am a christian ... not with a capital "C" as in born-again, but a christian nevertheless. Again, the gay community scoffs. I am a gay man in my 60s ... and anyone knows that that's 30 years too late to make a splash at the bars. I think Soulforce is here to empower the homeless and the dispossessed, even the spiritual orphans like myself.

Finally I have found a home. There are people here I can relate to and I can talk to who understand ... even sympathize ... with what I am feeling. These forums have offered me the opportunity to express some of my deepest feelings about God and my relationship to the divine. And to have a few laughs and shed a few tears as well. I try not to give anyone unsolicited advice, but I know I end up doing it anyway. Forgive me. I try to talk about my own experience, in case that might be helpful for someone else to understand their own.

I'm not the heavy poster some of you are ... life doesn't seem to offer me the time to spend here that I would like. And sometimes I just don't have anything to say on a topic. I read it. I learn, but I keep quiet. Some days I still feel battered and bruised by life's exclusion of my gayness. Other days I feel like a new man. That's what I bring to the Soulforce forums.

[Zerbie]

I am so glad you're here.
I know I'm one who always enjoys your presence and your words. It's amazing to me, and really saddening, that the gay community - to whom you might turn expecting understanding and welcome - has it's set of exclusionary behaviors. Well, until now - I'd say this is the safest, most welcoming 'place' I've ever found in "public." And I'm so glad it fits a niche in your life, Ben.

[Gregory_de_Bois]

I don't distinctly remember what I was thinking when I joined here. I had been going through some tough (obsessive) times. I was really discovering who I was and trying to understand myself. This place helped me so much. I, like many others here, have been challenged to think (especially by them old folk), taught to love, and helped to truly accept who I am. I am so happy to have found this place (second only to my two best friends) and will always be thankful for it.

Namaste,

Gregory

[paul]

Originally Posted by BenL

A lot of paths intersected in that month. I had been walking a difficult but rewarding path with my spouse, who is trans. It had included the loss of our children. (One has reestablished contact, the other still hasn't after three years.) I had always been honest with my spouse about the fact that I am gay, but had never been out publicly. My therapist suggested that perhaps I would benefit from associating with other GLBT people who had the kind of spiritual goals that I do.

And then I got an email from a friend suggesting that I take a look at the Soulforce forums. I joined immediately. Funny thing is that the friend never did. He doesn't do internet discussion groups.

I had participated in several listservs and discussion boards, mostly about mixed orientation marriages, which is what I thought I was in until my husband came out as trans. This one, by far, is the most civil I have ever belonged to. I have experienced flame wars that singed what little hair I have left.

I have never belonged anywhere comfortably. I am a gay man who thought he was married to a woman. The gay male community told me to divorce and become authentic. Now I'm a gay man married to a transman. Oh, get real. How can you settle for less than the total package? I am a christian ... not with a capital "C" as in born-again, but a christian nevertheless. Again, the gay community scoffs. I am a gay man in my 60s ... and anyone knows that that's 30 years too late to make a splash at the bars. I think Soulforce is here to empower the homeless and the dispossessed, even the spiritual orphans like myself.

Finally I have found a home. There are people here I can relate to and I can talk to who understand ... even sympathize ... with what I am feeling. These forums have offered me the opportunity to express some of my deepest feelings about God and my relationship to the divine. And to have a few laughs and shed a few tears as well. I try not to give anyone unsolicited advice, but I know I end up doing it anyway. Forgive me. I try to talk about my own experience, in case that might be helpful for someone else to understand their own.

I'm not the heavy poster some of you are ... life doesn't seem to offer me the time to spend here that I would like. And sometimes I just don't have anything to say on a topic. I read it. I learn, but I keep quiet. Some days I still feel battered and bruised by life's exclusion of my gayness. Other days I feel like a new man. That's what I bring to the Soulforce forums.

Ben,
I cannot imagine this place without you, you are family. You are such a person, you bring an enormous amount. Quality beats quantity, don't underestimate your impact. Also, I know I should tell people more often that they do indeed impact me. You do.

paul

[paul]

Originally Posted by andrewlittle

I lived in a tiny community in deep rural Iowa, where Jenna was pastoring a church. I looked around and all I saw was people who looked like me, and I was forlorn. Jenna gave a sermon about inclusion - the one that led to her being run out of Iowa on a rail - and following that a man who had been a member of that church all his life came to her privately and said, "God bless you! This is the first time I have really felt like I belong in my own church." You don't have to guess why - he was gay.

I couldn't find a church in that area - there weren't many Presbyterian churches and no ministers died or got kicked out - and no-one wanted to hire the "minister's husband" to work for them, so I was long-term unemployed and unemployable. Out of the need to be around people who were more open and less parochial, Jenna and I attended a LGBT conference in Iowa City. We heard Mel White speak, and got to meet and talk with him. I learned aboiut Soulforce.

I came - I joined - I posted. I found my lifeline into the real and loving church I believe Jesus intended. This has been my primary church ever since. At the time, this place gave me a place of respite from an all-white, all-straight, male dominated little world. It saved my life. Now, it feeds my life abundantly. It is my family - and is far more functional, even in its contentious times - than my family of origin.

So I'm here, and here I intend to stay. You poor bast--ds.

Andy,
Do you have any idea how important you are? Many of us had to run for our lives from the world you are a part of. To have an advocate in that world is priceless. There is no greater love than to give up your life for a friend...I understand that you pay such a price. Thank you friend.
paul

[paul]

Oh, 9 months. Because I needed friends.

Found them.


Paul

[Zerbie]

Originally Posted by paul

Oh, 9 months. Because I needed friends.

Found them.


Paul

I'm so glad!!!!

[andrewlittle]

Originally Posted by paul

Andy,
Do you have any idea how important you are? Many of us had to run for our lives from the world you are a part of. To have an advocate in that world is priceless. There is no greater love than to give up your life for a friend...I understand that you pay such a price. Thank you friend.
paul

Paul,

Understand that this was about me and my needs. I was let into a community, and invited to become family, by people who had every reason to not want me around. This isn't the world in which I normally live - it is a little bit of the world in which the majority are unlike me in some very noticeable ways. And, yet, I am accepted, embraced and then loved. If only "my" world could learn from this sacred place.

And, I didn't give up my life for a friend - I found my life in friendship. To me, that's an important distinction. I am not here doing you favors - I am here being the recipient of yours.

[Zerbie]

Originally Posted by andrewlittle

Paul,

Understand that this was about me and my needs. I was let into a community, and invited to become family, by people who had every reason to not want me around. This isn't the world in which I normally live - it is a little bit of the world in which the majority are unlike me in some very noticeable ways. And, yet, I am accepted, embraced and then loved. If only "my" world could learn from this sacred place.

But of course you are embraced and loved here!! Okay, so you're not gay. But you are one of us.


And, I didn't give up my life for a friend - I found my life in friendship. To me, that's an important distinction. I am not here doing you favors - I am here being the recipient of yours.

You know what? I feel the same way about the opportunities I've had to express myself recently. What I do is like a tiny 'thank you - i love you' to many friends I've had over the years, and adds up to about one millionth of the love and caring they've given me over a lifetime. The sense of *privilege* is overwhelming.

At the same time, the things we do sometimes have a cost, Andy, as was the case with you and Jenna. Your friends here are not unaware of that. The sense of good fortune at having such friends goes both ways. Isn't that wonderful?