"There's no such thing as homosexuality"

[BruceChris]

Or heterosexuality, for some of us, for both terms describe the relationship between two unambiguously gendered persons. Many of us are not as specifically gendered as we might like to believe. The Olympic officials have struggled with the matter of defining who is or is not female, for the purpose of being allowed to compete. They have found that

"Like the rest of life, gender is not all black and white. There are countless shades of gray"

An article in the First Light (GLBT) Yahoo users group digest 3338

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/FirstLight/

posted a link to a New York Times article that examines the question in some depth. The article covers the subject in some detail. I urge all of you to read as much of it as you can.

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/08/03/op...pagewanted=all or,

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/FirstLight/message/21787

Originally Posted by New York times

It would be nice to live in a world in which maleness and femaleness were firm and unwavering poles. People can be forgiven for wanting to live in a world as simple as this, a place in which something as basic as gender didn’t shift unsettlingly beneath our feet.

The situation is summed up nicely by the Times in this one sentence:

So what makes someone female then? If it’s not chromosomes, or a uterus, or the ability to get pregnant, or femininity, or being attracted to men, then what is it, and how can you possibly test for it?

And the same goes for males.

If I have sex with a transperson who has only partially transitioned, am I having heterosexual sex or homosexual sex? And I have done just that, at times in my life.

Peace and Love, Bruce Chris

[Alecto]

"queer"

[Unmasked]

Human.

That's the only word for people. Gay, straight, it doesn't mean anything. Human is what we are.

[tdogg]

The more society tries to stuff people into nifty little sealed up boxes, the more individuals shift. That's the problem. Not in defining male and female, but in a need to make the definition. Why can't we just be BruceChris, Rick, Toni, or whoever?

You ever fill out those little questionnaires, say when signing up for on-line access to something? Never fails to include the question male or female, and requires a check mark next to one. See, that's the problem. There is no room for gray, no room for shifting, no room for individuality. Why does it matter??? I can understand to a certain extent, in specific situations - take for example, the Olympics. Certainly, it would be extremely difficult for one not built as sturdy as the next to out lift, out wrestle the other. Maybe the answer there is 3 divisions. I'm not sure.

The thing I know for sure is, it's not fair or productive to place labels on people, put them into boxes and hold them to that.

[Emproph]

There's no such thing as homo...
There's no such thing as homo...
There's no such thing as homo...

[tymejumper]

Originally Posted by Alecto

"queer"

How about GenderQueer? I call our kids "Queerspawn"!


How I wish we could love and be who we are and who we want and just have lots of hot lustful sex with out havin to name it all and catagorize it.

[Alecto]

Generally, anything that doesn't fit a category but isn't heteronormative, I lump in with "queer" (which might be just one reason I love that word).

[BruceChris]

That Emproph is telling the whole world that he is a friend of Dorothy

Peace and Love, Bruce Chris

[BishopIoan]

Originally Posted by BruceChris

Or heterosexuality, for some of us, for both terms describe the relationship between two unambiguously gendered persons. Many of us are not as specifically gendered as we might like to believe. The Olympic officials have struggled with the matter of defining who is or is not female, for the purpose of being allowed to compete. They have found that

"Like the rest of life, gender is not all black and white. There are countless shades of gray"

An article in the First Light (GLBT) Yahoo users group digest 3338

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/FirstLight/

posted a link to a New York Times article that examines the question in some depth. The article covers the subject in some detail. I urge all of you to read as much of it as you can.

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/08/03/op...pagewanted=all or,

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/FirstLight/message/21787



The situation is summed up nicely by the Times in this one sentence:

So what makes someone female then? If it’s not chromosomes, or a uterus, or the ability to get pregnant, or femininity, or being attracted to men, then what is it, and how can you possibly test for it?

And the same goes for males.

If I have sex with a transperson who has only partially transitioned, am I having heterosexual sex or homosexual sex? And I have done just that, at times in my life.

Peace and Love, Bruce Chris

I believe that we are human--an existence which embraces many sexualities. Hetero, homo, lesbian, bi, transpeople, butch or femme. You cannot specifically test for a gender because gender is so much more than the apparent, such as appearance or chromosones.

This is the richness of God's Creation which homophobes/ other bigots refuse to see. There's a lot out there if we have the eyes to see.

[scott snedeker]

Originally Posted by BishopIoan

I believe that we are human--an existence which embraces many sexualities. Hetero, homo, lesbian, bi, transpeople, butch or femme. You cannot specifically test for a gender because gender is so much more than the apparent, such as appearance or chromosones.

This is the richness of God's Creation which homophobes/ other bigots refuse to see. There's a lot out there if we have the eyes to see.

And ya know! I have no doubt that we (Americans) have gone too far in as much that we are too much into our own heads and too much into each other's heads.

Understanding where my neuroses come from has empowered me over them but dammit! I think I have to move on!

"Just Do it!" and don't try to analyse who you are!

Enough of:

Am I Gay?
Am I moral?
Is God Judging me?
Are people Judging me?
Am I judging me?


Barf! my head hurts!

Live for the moment! No moment is more important than the very one right now!

Anyone else had enough?

[BishopIoan]

I'll join ya, Scott. I quit worrying about it a long time ago.

[BruceChris]

Eve Ensler, the woman who wrote "The Vagina Monologues", travels the world over raising money to help fight violence against women. Of course she has her own website:

http://www.vday.org

If you want to sign up for her V-news, you fill out the form below:

* indicates required fields

your email address: *

your first name: *
your last name: *
postal code: *
country: *
your age:
your gender:
Female Male
Or other:

For gender, you can choose Male, Female, or Other, with a little box to explain what you mean by other. You can see it better here:

http://www.vday.org/contents/action/vmail

I think that I went with GenderQueer, when I signed up.

Peace and Love, Bruce Chris

[Alecto]

More and more folks are at very least including a third tick-box.

[tdogg]

It's always irritating to me, when asked to check the little box female, or male. Also, indicating age. Like when filling out those purchase cards (supposedly to get the 'warranty'). What's up with that? Like the company won't replace my damaged camera if I'm a 49 year old female? Did I just say my age and gender? Stupid, isn't it?

I can see for medical reasons, and maybe even on-line dating. But sheesh, is it required for everything??? Hmm, maybe next time I'll make my own little third box. Sometimes, I do feel a little manly....

[BruceChris]

For online dating, most places give you 4 choices. Female seeking Female, and so on.

P&L, BC

[tdogg]

Originally Posted by BruceChris

For online dating, most places give you 4 choices. Female seeking Female, and so on.

P&L, BC

Except eHarmony. My partner said she went all through the personal evaluation session (about 2 ours worth of time and effort) just to be told after that they don't handle same-sex match-ups.

[Alecto]

Many surveys that I've taken have a box for extra comments. I always make note of the gender options there (especially if it's unclear what they actually want to know: gender or sex? Both of which really need to have an "other" box).

Oh e-harmony. Cause homo-relationships are omg so foreign and different!