Bad News

[Gregory_de_Bois]

Steve,

I don't know if this is of any help to you, but I'm going to give it to you. The Episcopal Church is almost always, with some exceptions, a welcoming place where GLBT persons are accepted. I found this church that is in Andalusia, Alabama, and I hope that it will be helpful. St. Mary's Episcopal Church: http://www.stmarysandalusia.org/index.cfm

I advise you to listen to what everyone else has said; these people care for you, even if you are somewhat of a stranger to us. May you be blessed!

[Gregory_de_Bois]

Note: I have requested information from St. Mary's in Andalusia to see if they are gay-friendly.

[stevejones]

I know where that church is and idk if they r or not they might be..let me kno what u find out..THANKS!

[andrewlittle]

When I was 17 I had the world by the ass. I knew everything I needed to know, and it was the rest of the world that was f'd up.

Every time for a whole year that the police had stopped my car I had been clean, and yet they tore my car apart anyway (back in the 70's they had more latitude). With no proof, my mom got a drug counselor to come talk to me. I chewed him up one side and then down the other. I knew what I was doing and I was doing just fine.

Then I ate one too many black beauties (speed), overdosed and had a heart attack - yes, at 17. I knew I was self-medicating for all the shit in my childhood - I knew I had a right to do it, because no-one understood how f'd up I was from the beatings and torture. I wanted to be numb, and I had a right to as long as I didn't hurt anyone. No-one could tell me otherwise, but many tried.

By 26, hooked on heroin and still doing speed, qualudes and drinking like a fish, I still had that right - right up till I had my sixth overdose and second heart attack. I had that right right up to when I was 30 and overdoses yet again, this time totalling my car and wiping out my knees.

Now, when I am a 54 year old man who walks with pain and with a body of a 75 year old, I know what everybody was doing when they told me I was a fucking idiot. They were loving me and trying to get me to see that there was a much better way to get help - a way that loved myself instead of punishing myself for being so damn different than everyone else.

So, go ahead, get pissy. But, let me tell you, I'm a lucky one. I have 27 dead friends who overdosed and didn't make it. I have all of their pictures. I was the only one addicted to heroin, but I lived - if you call this living, which sometimes I don't. Only one was on anything harder than prescription meds, but they fucking killed themselves.

So, Steve, if you don't want to die young, clean up your fucking act and get help before you end up like me - a 54 year old man with a really screwed up body, who occasionally wishes I had died young because the physical pain is just a little to much to deal with when you can't take any thing addicting.

Now, if you do want to die young, just keep up what you're doing - if it doesn't happen from drugs it will be by "suicide by cop" since they already have your number.

Damn, young man, you have so much to live for - actually try living into it.

[Gregory_de_Bois]

Originally Posted by andrewlittle

When I was 17 I had the world by the ass. I knew everything I needed to know, and it was the rest of the world that was f'd up.

Every time for a whole year that the police had stopped my car I had been clean, and yet they tore my car apart anyway (back in the 70's they had more latitude). With no proof, my mom got a drug counselor to come talk to me. I chewed him up one side and then down the other. I knew what I was doing and I was doing just fine.

Then I ate one too many black beauties (speed), overdosed and had a heart attack - yes, at 17. I knew I was self-medicating for all the shit in my childhood - I knew I had a right to do it, because no-one understood how f'd up I was from the beatings and torture. I wanted to be numb, and I had a right to as long as I didn't hurt anyone. No-one could tell me otherwise, but many tried.

By 26, hooked on heroin and still doing speed, qualudes and drinking like a fish, I still had that right - right up till I had my sixth overdose and second heart attack. I had that right right up to when I was 30 and overdoses yet again, this time totalling my car and wiping out my knees.

Now, when I am a 54 year old man who walks with pain and with a body of a 75 year old, I know what everybody was doing when they told me I was a fucking idiot. They were loving me and trying to get me to see that there was a much better way to get help - a way that loved myself instead of punishing myself for being so damn different than everyone else.

So, go ahead, get pissy. But, let me tell you, I'm a lucky one. I have 27 dead friends who overdosed and didn't make it. I have all of their pictures. I was the only one addicted to heroin, but I lived - if you call this living, which sometimes I don't. Only one was on anything harder than prescription meds, but they fucking killed themselves.

So, Steve, if you don't want to die young, clean up your fucking act and get help before you end up like me - a 54 year old man with a really screwed up body, who occasionally wishes I had died young because the physical pain is just a little to much to deal with when you can't take any thing addicting.

Now, if you do want to die young, just keep up what you're doing - if it doesn't happen from drugs it will be by "suicide by cop" since they already have your number.

Damn, young man, you have so much to live for - actually try living into it.

Steven, listen to this guy. He is one hell of a helper. I know he has been for me. I haven't heard from the church yet. I hope they respond.